Jukanovich Journals

2011 Family Newsletter

2011-12-31T04:07:00.001-08:00

Wishing you and your loved ones a year full of joy, love and inspiration.

There are more people than a heart could ever hold, More places than you could ever see
The scrolling list of needs just grows and goes, 24 hours, 7 days a week
‘Cause we think about so much, And do nothing at all, Afraid that what we have to give is so small

You don’t have to save the world, All that hero talk is only superficial stuff
If you want to change the world, What you’ve got to do is show up, show up, just show up

We’re so used to an immediate response, So used to giving up when things don’t work
We know the long obedience is hard, No shortcuts will make it easier
‘Cause the journey is so long, But the difference is made, By the million small steps along the way

You don’t have to save the world, All that hero talk is only superficial stuff
If you want to change the world, What you’ve got to do is show up, show up, just show up

No great things have I done, No great things have I done
Only small things with great love, And love makes a world of difference, You don’t have to save it

You don’t have to save the world, All that hero talk is only superficial stuff
If you want to change the world, What you’ve got to do is show up, show up, just show up

Jill Phillips, Show Up
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Nathanael. Our 2 1/2 year old little boy is gentle, pure and strong. He loves life and has a smile and a hello for everyone. He spends most mornings with our house-helper, while Jennifer homeschools Lian, and as a result is our first bilingual child and understands everything in Kinyarwandan and English. He loves to talk, but we are still waiting for when we can understand him. He loves his Nanna and Poppa and is always asking to Skype with them. This boy can dance and loves to play the piano and drums. He is a wonderful brother and wakes up in the morning calling for Anna. As he is very social, we’ve decided to enroll him in Anna’s French preschool in January. He may understand three languages before he can speak one. He is a little fish in the water and loves the shores of Kivu as well as Shadow Lake in Vermont. He will truly melt your hearts when you meet him, as he has ours.

Anna. Our 5 year old is a creative spirit! It is so fun to see each of our children develop their own loves and talents this year. Anna’s highlight of the year was performing in Ballet Rwanda’s Nutcracker with her friends. She practiced every night and was poised and beautiful in the performance. We changed preschools on her again and she loves her new school, Le Petit Callines. In three months, she is already reciting poems in French. We also found a Chinese tutor, so the girls go twice a week to meet Lao Shi in this tiny apartment in a downtown alley where their teacher makes and sells tofu and soy milk. Jennifer has to speak in Kinyarwandan to the Chinese husband in order to communicate with his wife. Anna has also started playing soccer on a new international kids’ league. She was the only girl and the smallest player at first and we were so proud of how she overcame her fears. Her new best friend is Marcel Urquhart, who was adopted into our partners’ family this year. They are like two peas in a pod.

Lian. Lian has also really come into her own this year. A friend coaches the National Rwandan Tae Kwon Do team and offered to give Lian private lessons. Every morning she practices with her dad and in six months she has earned her yellow belt and blue stripe. She is now inspired to train for a competition next year. She attends 3rd grade homeschool with Mommy and has loved learning about Ancient History this year. Another new hobby this year is horseback riding. It has been another great joy to see her overcoming fears and learning to ride. As there is not much entertainment and we don’t own a TV, Lian is the queen of creativity and loves making up games, art projects and stories with her sister. Our house is usually a disaster as a result, but we love watching them bond.

Highlights for Dano and Jennifer.
Seeing Karisimbi Partners grow and highlighted by the Daedalus Experiment and New Times.

Taking the family on vacation in Amsterdam, Copenhagen and Legoland this summer, before spending time with Jen’s family in Vermont.

Annual Gordon reunion with Jennifer’s friends and their families.

Leading an orphan care training together in Kaziba, Democratic Republic of Congo for 32 caregivers.

Jen learning a new job as Communications Specialist for a USAID agriculture project.

Hosting Easter camp for 45 kids and then Christmas camp for 130 kids in our house and watching them all respond to the good news of Jesus.

Starting a sewing school for 11 moms in the neighborhood and working with Noonday Collection to purchase their products upon completion of their training.

Welcoming friends Mary-Catherine Lader, Melanie and Marissa Usakokol, Santiago Sedaca, Steve Beck, Peb Jackson and housemates Celine and Dar to Rwanda.

Facilitating adoptions for two Rwandan children.

Weekly Sunday worship and fellowship times at our home.

Wishing you and yours a wonderful New Year!

The Need for Vacation

2011-11-01T04:24:00.000-07:00

We are now in our third year of life in Rwanda. After a wonderful time with family and friends on the East Coast, plus a week’s vacation in Amsterdam and Denmark, we were ready to reenter life here. I have never craved vacation as I have until I moved here. As a child, our family rarely took vacations. I’ve tried to place my finger on it and I think I need to face the reality that sometimes life in a cross-cultural situation is just challenging, thus draining and thus we crave some distance.

What are the challenges?

Constantly known as the Muzungu. Even if I’ve sought to learn some Kinyarwandan and have immersed myself in the neighborhood, I am still the muzungu the moment I walk out my gate. “Chocolate, amafaranga (money)” are the constant requests. Even if I have been to the market a thousand times in a year, I am still the outsider having to barter for what I believe should be the fair price and not the price due to the color of my skin. And even though I seek to understand the cultural nuances, I will most surely end up offending someone because I did something that is not acceptable here, but I just hadn't learned that nuance yet.

Constantly expecting something to not go as planned. As I’m currently reading Little House on the Prairie to my five year old, I am struck with the reality that my living situation here is quite comfortable in comparison to life on the American frontier in the late 1800s. Yet, compared to 21^st century America, it is not. Water can turn off without any warning. My neighbors often come to share water when the village well is dry. A new road in our neighborhood is a God-send, yet, I am well aware that this will mean a power outage of at least an hour to four hours for every day during construction, which can last weeks. So I never stock the fridge to capacity, even though it is only a third of the size of a standard American fridge, because I don’t want to risk losing food. Even in work, I can plan for two weeks to get invitations out for an event, but when the printer actually runs out of ink and then asks the customer to purchase it for him, that was never in the plan.

Constantly reminded that a little can go a long way. Every time I open my gate and see my neighbor, I am faced with the reality that my Bourbon latte could pay for her son’s three months of education. Do I have a coffee that day or do I help my neighbor? I have to say that I have stopped buying as many coffees out and purchased coffee for my own home. It saves a lot and allows me to spend more on those in my neighborhood, but sometimes I just want to enjoy that iced late. My children have lots of art supplies – there is not much to do here, which is a positive. My children have become very creative at creating their own fun. Yet, there is always the tension of how much do I just keep the supplies and toys for my children and when do I use them to bless other kids in the neighborhood. These are daily decisions that weren’t always as apparent to me in the States even though we lived in an inner-city neighborhood.

These are all tensions for which I am actually grateful as they are forever changing how my family looks at the world. Yet, I’d be lying if I didn’t say that sometimes they just get tiring and the shores of Lake Kivu cry out for perspective, beauty and fun. Thankfully, I am married to a man who loves to both work hard and play hard and is committed to seeing as much of the beauty of this country and Continent as is possible.

After two or three days away, I do feel rejuvenated. When I look out into the beauty of Lake Kivu, I stand in awe that I am here in the heart of the continent for such a time as this. When I return home, I have the energy to have tea with the women in my neighborhood and to dream and plan with them regarding their future employment; I shed tears as the house staff for the Karisimbi team pray over us and thank us for treating them like family; and I celebrate with the 12 year old deaf boy, Imanishimwe, as he runs to my house to tell me he is first in his class! It is a good life here. Sometimes I just need perspective.

Trip to Kaziba Orphanage, Congo

2011-05-22T06:02:00.000-07:00

Our time in Kaziba was short and meaningful. All of my anxieties about being in Congo seemed to disappear as we drove up the beautiful escarpment leaving behind beautiful Lake Kivu and headed into mountains reminiscent of the Fjords in Norway. It didn’t seem that different from Rwanda, but it was. Somehow I felt safe and secure heading towards the orphanage, yet the reality is it is a lawless region. Vigilante justice is done towards those who commit crimes because the government cannot be trusted. Bribes are the currency of business and so there is no infrastructure, no industry sectors. Except for mining. And mining is lucrative for those at the top, as long as you close your eyes to what happens to those at the bottom. But this is what we heard, not what we saw….what we saw was… (For pictures of our trip please go to - http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150307917392926.413861.760487925&l=cd3eaef862)

A home…full of children…a home that a year ago housed children so malnourished that many of the newborns weren’t expected to live. The one year olds did not receive enough Vitamin D through milk and sunlight that their fontanel lobes were not closing. There were two caregivers for 32 children. That is when Holly Mulford met the children and adopted two twin baby girls. Through the generosity of friends and her own personal motivation, she did a formula drive that has ensured each child receives adequate formula every day. She got medical care for kids who needed it. She raised funds so they could hire more staff – they had 4 last year, now there are 17 women. She raised funds to build a wall around the property so that the home would be safe and therefore they built their own garden and are now supplying the orphanage with beans and maize from their own land. They just recently got chickens for eggs and will have a cow soon. Holly has helped facilitate several adoptions from this orphanage as well as she shares the news of these children who lost their mothers in childbirth. (If you are interested in sponsoring a child, please go to http://www.tumainidrc.org/.

We were there to do a training on building attachment between the caregivers and the children. I structured it around the parable of the Good Shepherd. I believe orphans will receive better care when their caregivers are honored and cared for themselves. So we spent a lot of time holding their hands, looking into their eyes, acknowledging their names, giving them gifts, showing them we see them – truly see them. Yet, there were times when I almost had to look away from their eyes because their eyes were crying out for love and it was almost too much for me to handle. I don’t know their stories. They wouldn’t share what they wrote or drew during our reflection time, but I know God spoke to them. When we talked about how the Good Shepherd walks his sheep through the dark and dangerous places they all began to sway and say, “Amen.” I cannot imagine their dark places. Yet, here they are caring for children and for many of them this is a lifelong commitment. They have been there 17 years, 25 years, 35 years. There are only three orphanages in the whole south Lake Kivu region. There are always new children being brought in. These caregivers are tired, but thanks to the work Holly has launched they said they now have confidence in the work they are doing.

We had them play…a lot…I think that is the best way to learn by experience. This was different for them, but they jumped right into it. Attachment games, sensory building games. Pure joy. We gave them blankets made by their “enemies” – the Rwandans. The irony of it is the manager of Amani in Rwanda lost her husband to Congolese soldiers when Rwanda invaded Congo in 1996. Here she was making 35 blankets for her enemy. But isn’t that how forgiveness happens? One heart decision at a time?

Yet, will what we did be implemented? To move from survival to development is the challenge of any work in a developing country. It is a complete mindset change. As I told the director, if they just spend 15 minutes a day in focused play it will actually save them time in behavior problems for the rest of the day, but he is so overwhelmed by what it takes to clothe, feed and bathe these children that he can’t see the forest through the trees. It is just hard to comprehend. But I believe Mama Lili got it. I believe she will use the toys and methods for discipline we discussed because I sense in her heart that she wants the best for these children.

I could have used a week there I think to really help with the implementation, but that is my struggle here. I have my own children to attend to. Three days was enough. They need their momma. They need their daddy. And when we returned, I held them close.

On a personal note, I struggle. The needs in Congo were overwhelming. The lawlessness prevents any good from surviving here. That is the difference between Congo and Rwanda. For all the critiques of Rwanda’s police state, there is law and order and so civil society can flourish. That does not exist in Congo. Just last week there was a change in regiments in the local Bukavu military base. The new regiment came and robbed the local bank. They shot a local man. Tons of eye witnesses, yet no one comes forward because there is no one to listen. And so my heart feels heavy for this country. My heart feels heavy for the children we saw this weekend. What is their future? I am not sure, but I pray that the caregivers felt cared for and will in turn love on these children.

I saw what I saw and I can't forget it
I heard what I heard and I can't go back
I know what I know and I can't deny it

Something on the road, cut me to the soul

Your pain has changed me
your dream inspires
your face a memory
your hope a fire
your courage asks me what I'm afraid of
(what I am made of)
and what I know of love

we've done what we've done and we can't erase it
we are what we are and it's more than enough
we have what we have but it's no substitution

Something on the road, touched my very soul

I say what I say with no hesitation
I have what I have and I'm giving it up
I do what I do with deep conviction

Something on the road, changed my world

Sara Groves

Reflections on April 7

2011-04-06T11:04:00.000-07:00

We have now lived in Rwanda for one and a half years. Last April, I could feel something change in the air as April 7, the anniversary of the genocide, approached. I wasn't sure what to expect. In some ways, life went on....for me....I was fearful of large crowds (and the US Embassy Warden definitely advises staying away from them at this time of the year), so I did not attend the memorial gathering at the national stadium. The streets were quiet. We do not have a television, so we were spared the telecasts reminding people of the atrocities that occurred during those 100 days. I tried to talk with our staff, but I could see they were struggling. So it was quiet. And we prayed. And life went on...for me...

Now I have more Rwandan friends. And I've realized that it is not a question of "Did you lose someone?", but rather "Who did you lose?"

I asked our househelper how she was doing yesterday. She doesn't like to talk about it. She simply said that in the month of April everyone becomes 1994 again. Now she can forgive, but it is still hard.

Just today, as part of my work in doing communications for a USAID project, I was interviewing four farmers up in the northwestern region of Musanze. This region borders both Congo and Uganda. It was encouraging to hear them share how their life has improved since joining a cooperative that is progressing. I asked them what their hopes were for their children now that they are seeing progress in their economic life. I expected to hear the usual hopes of education, success. Instead, what all four said to me in different ways was, "When you have seen and experienced what we went through 17 years ago, all you want for your children is for that to never happen again. You want peace and stability."

I returned home to an email from a friend. We had invited him and his wife to dinner this Saturday. We knew it was the memorial week and said if they'd prefer to postpone until next month, we would completely understand. I have known him for a year. He was actually our attorney for Nathanael's adoption and I have continued to work with him. He shared how he and his wife both lost their parents in the genocide and he lost four of his sisters and brothers as well. Prior to this, what I knew of this man was his incredible heart. He facilitates adoptions because he loves to bring families together. He does free legal aid for orphans on the weekends. Now I know why and my heart broke.

Another friend and colleague shared his story with us. It is one of incredible tragedy. They all are. He is the only survivor. We asked him if he would rather be alone this weekend or would he like to join us for dinner. He said he is usually alone during this memorial, so he would love to be with our family for dinner. How do we honor the family he lost and let him enter into our family at the same time? Lian's response was simple, "I'll teach him how to play Uno! That would be something fun for him."

I met a woman from our church this past weekend. She has written a book called Frida: Chosen to Die, Destined to Live. I read it in a day. I have read so many of these stories. Sometimes I ask myself why I subject myself to them. But in reading them, I find incredible stories of forgiveness and grace amidst incredible evil. I see the hand of God in the midst of a world that denies his existance. I find strength. And in reading their stories, I somehow feel I am honoring the lives of those who were tragically killed in this place I now call home.

Rwanda may feel very far away. But today, I would ask you to just offer a moment of silence for the almost one million people whose beauty and talents this world has lost. May we never, ever see such tragedy again.

Going to Congo - Would you like to help?

2011-03-31T11:59:00.000-07:00

On May 20, Dano and I will be traveling three hours west of Bukavo, Congo to facilitate a training for the careproviders of 30 orphan boys and girls ages 0-6, with the majority being under 3. We are seeking to raise $1100 to purchase weighted blankets and sensory toys for these children. A friend of mine from college, Holly Mulford, and her husband, Michael, have lived in Congo for almost five years working with Food for the Hungry. They are the parents of four beautiful children, two of whom are adopted from this orphanage. Holly and Michael are moving back to the States in June and working hard to secure sustainability for this small orphanage.

Background on the orphanage - It is a small orphanage that accepts infants whose mothers' died in birth and fathers' are unable to take care of them. When Holly first arrived there, most of the children were chronically malnourished and all are severely delayed for lack of being held or any attention paid to assisting them with motor skills. Because of lack of space, the orphans are returned to their families (willingly or not) once they reach around the age of five. Holly did a formula campaign and did a simple training to teach the care providers how to mix the formula and the results in the children's health have been incredible.

The director is a wonderful man who is committed to learning better ways of caring for the children and Holly trusts him. Holly asked me to do a training that incorporates elements of attachment therapy and play therapy. While I am not a child psychologist, I have learned a great deal since adopting my three children and have sought to incorporate what I learn into how I interact with orphans here in Rwanda. The theme of my training will be "The Good Shepherd" because my first goal is help the care providers feel loved and cared for and then help train them in some practical ways to encourage attachment and sensory stimulation for the children.

My Request - I am working with a women's coop here in Rwanda, AMANI, to make 30 weighted blankets that are 58x58 cm each. Our daughter, Lian, was first given a weighted blanket by Dr. Karyn Purvis as a way to apply deep pressure, thus stimulating serotonin which helps relax the child. For children who have experienced trauma and have been without physical touch in their first few months, sensory processing disorder is a common result of this lack of touch. These blankets are one way of providing them with physical pressure that doesn't require an adult (and in this case there is one adult for every eight babies). We still bring my daughter's blanket with her if I know we may be in a stressful environment. It immediately calms her. It is also one item that the children can have as their own.

In order to get the needed weight, I have to fill each blanket with 1 kg of polypellets. These are the best material to use, especially in a place where the blankets will need to be handwashed. We cannot get these polypellets here and they are $7 per blanket +tax (cheapest I could find for 1 kg). I have a few friends coming back to the States who are willing to put these in their suitcases, but I need to order them right away. Amani is still giving me an estimated cost of the blankets, but I anticipate the final cost to be close to $30. I will know by next Tuesday what the exact cost is. I want to make 30 blankets.

In addition, I am wanting to buy the following: Wilbarger Therapressure Brushes ($80 for 24 brushes), which again help to stimulate neurotransmitters that release calming chemicals in the children's brains. Again, I have personally seen the benefits of these. I am also wanting to buy a tactile massage ball ($35) for the orphanage and a set of sensory play toys ($80 for 11 toys). And I need to get these sent with friends who are traveling here as soon as possible.

My Total Request: $1100.

Children's Hope Chest has agreed to serve as the umbrella organization for this orphanage until a separate 501c3 is established. We are currently working with them to set up a giving page for this orphanage and it should be up and running early next week.

As I need to order these supplies by next week in order to ensure they arrive in time to Rwanda and in time to make the needed blankets, I am seeking to gauge interest in friends who might be interested in supporting this effort. If you would like to make a donation, please email me directly at jennifer@jukanovich.com or leave a comment saying you want to give. I will email the donation link as soon as the page is created.

Thank you for helping us love on these children in a way that makes a long-term distance to their spiritual and physical well-being.

Why I went to Swaziland

2010-10-24T12:36:00.001-07:00

Why did I go to Swaziland? For the past six years, I have served on the board of Children’s Hope Chest, an orphan care organization that is doing amazing work in Russia, Swaziland, Uganda, and Ethiopia. In that six years, I have also become a mother to three incredible children – all through adoption. The issue of orphan care has become that much more important to me as I know first hand the effects of abandonment and neglect and it deeply affects my heart when I think that Lian or Anna or Nathanael could be one of these children waiting to be loved by someone.

And I want there to be faithful, honest, loving people who are that someone in an orphan’s life, rather than the sexual predators and vermon that literally wait outside the doors of an orphanage, vocational school or hut when these orphans are forced into the real world. So it encourages my heart when I meet more of these “someone’s” who are that safe and caring person in an orphan’s life. To meet a “gogo” (Grandmother) who appalled at the fact that Swazis who live next to a garbage dump were selling their children for sex so the family could have food on the table, chose to knock on every door and plead with the parents to find another solution. Turns out she was the solution. The need was a lack of money to send children to school. So she became their school. This gogo who has nothing herself in terms of financial means, started feeding and educating the children of the dump and now 250 children are at her carepoint every day. Children’s Hope Chest is now partnering with her and the carepoint has been matched to a church community in the States whose church members have now “adopted” all of these children by sponsoring them, visiting them annually and providing the resources needed to ensure these children are fed and educated above subsistence. This is why I wanted to go.

But I also left feeling conflicted inside because I have seen so much poverty and pain on trips just like the one I took last week. I witnessed it in my Seattle neighborhood and I witness it every day in Rwanda. I have been “over educated” when it comes to caring for the orphan and my heart and mind long to do more with that knowledge. I’m not sure what this year will bring, but I know my heart has not been broken for me to just feel good about myself for wanting to care for the orphan. My heart has been broken so it can bring forth healing.

We stopped at a homestead to learn more about what the Swazi people are experiencing on a daily basis. We were supposed to hear about the plight of the orphan. We were surprised to meet a 38 year old woman whose health has been affected by a stroke, that led to epilepsy. Ndomi. She and I are the same exact age. I noticed her foot was black and horribly deformed. As polite as possible, I asked the mom what had happened. Ndomi had been burned by oil years ago, leaving a gaping wound at least an inch deep and two inches wide on the side of her foot. Since access to a clinic is at least a day’s walk, the mother puts a salve of burnt ash as an old wives’ tale remedy. Without realizing it, the wound has become gangrene. Our team respectfully asked if we could take the woman to the clinic at our carepoint. She agreed and I found myself holding Ndomi’s hand for 45 minutes as the doctor poured hydrogen peroxide over a gangrene wound. Ndomi would look at me in fear as if to ask if she was really going to be okay and I would look straight in her eyes and tell her that I know it hurts, but she will be better. She squeezed my hand so tight. I sang “Be still and know that I am God” quietly to her.

I marveled at the inner strength and courage this woman had – a woman most of Swazi society deems unworthy – a courage to allow a group of strangers to put her in a car, take her to a clinic, pour painful medicine over her foot and allow people to poke and prod at the gangrene. A staff member then took her to the hospital so they could surgically remove the dead tissue and thus hopefully stop the gangrene from spreading. I don’t know if her body will make it.

What I do know is that she was seen, she was known and her courage spoke to me. Keep fighting. No matter how hard the pain. No matter how hard the wound. Keep fighting for those who cannot fight for themselves.

The Truth about the Mosque at Ground Zero

2010-09-10T10:44:00.000-07:00

This week has been interesting living on the African continent and hearing word of the uproar over the alleged mosque being built at ground zero and the church burning the Quran. Just this morning all Americans in Rwanda received an alert from the State Department advising us to be on alert if we were traveling due to anger building over the controversies in the US. We received this at the same time as prayers could be heard around the city for the ending of Ramadan, an official national holiday here even though a very small percentage of the population are Muslims. Thus I found my friend, Charles Strohmer's, opinion piece helpful as I tried to sift through my own feelings of all these things as a Christian, as an American, and as a foreigner. I am embarrassed by the church that is burning the Quran and I appreciate Charles' factual piece on what is going on at Ground Zero.
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There is no mosque being built at ground zero in lower Manhattan. Nor are Imam Rauf and his Muslim colleagues planning to build a mosque at ground zero. Given all the media obfuscation, I thought I should make that fact immediately plain. And there are two or three other crucial facts you should know. But first, it’s location, location, location, the three most important words in real estate. And where is the real estate in question located? Any fourth grader with a street map of Lower Manhattan could point it out. Ground zero is located in the large area bordered by Vesey St. on the north, Church St. on the east, Liberty St. on the south, and West St. on the west.

http://www.charlesstrohmer.com/writings/on-international-relations/the-truth-about-the-mosque-at-ground-zero/

My grandmother - a family history

2010-08-31T11:04:00.000-07:00

We lost Dano's mom this year and in May we lost my father's mom, my Nanny, the matriarch of the huge Wolff clan. This past week, my family celebrated her life in the U.S.. It was very hard for me to not be there in, but I also know I had wonderful closure with her. My uncle, the historian of the family, wrote this beautiful eulogy and family history that I wanted to share. Nanny will be missed.

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A Eulogy for a Great Lady

We are here today to celebrate the life of Florence Mary Renk Wolff--she who has touched and shaped the lives of all here in this room and oh so many more during her long and productive life.

One feature of her life that always fascinated me was the long string of names by which she has been called over the years—Florence, Florie, Flo, Miss Renk, Mrs. Wolff, Toots, Hans, Nicole, Mom, Nicki, Mum, and Nanny. She started out being christened Florence Mary Renk when she was born in Chicago on February 17, 1915. There was war in Europe and the days of the horse and buggy were coming to an end. The new technology that helped to change us from an agricultural nation into an industrial one benefitted her as well because her father took up the new trade of automechanic. Her mother was born in this country too when her father came here to work in the great anthracite coal beds of northeastern Pennsylvania. His name was Clement Platek, and he died there in 1897, gunned down in a confrontation of miners and the strike breakers. As a result of his death, her mother Magdalena nee Czaja remarried a man named Topolski, and settled in Blue Island, Illinois. It was there Marie Platek met young John Renk, a Chicago native.

To her mom and dad, Florence became Florie and Flo, the former was her mother’s diminutive, and the latter her father’s. Early in life she suffered a crushing blow when her two younger brothers, Bobby and Arthur, both perished from the rampant respiratory diseases that plagued the US at the end of the war. This double tragedy had a profound effect upon the lives of John and Marie Renk. They not only doted on their remaining child but they also lost themselves in their own interests, Marie in cooking and John in mechanics. They sent Florence off to St. Gall’s Catholic school at 55^th and Kedzie. There she became the darling of the good nuns, many of whom remained lifelong friends like Sr. Monica. She went off to Providence High School and there also was a top student and favorite of the faculty. To them she was forever Florence and Miss Renk.

Florie also had numerous cousins, many of whom looked up to her as a big sister. Margie Esser was the daughter of Mom’s Aunt Marie, an older sister of her dad, and Catherine Mackin, the daughter of Ottilia nee Renk and Harold Mackin. She was also close to her cousins Henrietta and Gertrude, daughters of Aunt Marie from a different marriage and on her mother’s side cousin Irene, the daughter of Aunt Stella. In recent conversations with Marge and Catherine, both remembered many happy hours with Florie playing paper dolls.

Music certainly ran on the Renk side of the family, and so it was not too surprising that young Florence took an interest in piano and singing. Her beautiful mezzo-soprano voice joined the Sunday chorus of Catholics at St. Gall’s church. The members of the choir became fast friends over the years. One of the baritones was a young man who lived on Albany Street. His origins were German, he having been born in Germany on April 18, 1909. He arrived here with his parents in 1910 as an uncle brought his dad here to be carpenter in his house-building company. This chorister was of course one Bruno B. Wolff, a 24 year old draftsman working for Bethlehem Steel. Their courtship was short and fruitful as they were married on August 19, 1933, at St. Gall’s, shortly after her graduation from Providence. She now had a new name Mrs. Wolff. The newlyweds went on their honeymoon in of all places, Chicago. Yes these were the dark days of the Great Depression. Bruno was lucky to have a job when so many stood in bread lines.

But they scrimped and saved first by living with Marie and John. Then all of a sudden not a year later on June 15, 1934, she got another new name, Mom. For unto her a child was born and they named him Bruno. Soon after followed Philip on August 29, 1935 and James on January 14, 1937. This was a lot of folks to cram into the Renk three-bedroom bungalow on Christiana Ave. With the help of a relative’s loan, Mom and Dad built a brand new house on the south side, which was then on the boundary of Chicago civilization, in Little Flower parish. We occupied it in December 1941 just after Pearl Harbor. I still remember our first meal there, baked beans with pork. These came not from a can but were home baked and wonderful to the extent I can still taste them in the hollows of my mind. The relationship between Florence and Bruno was highlighted by his calling her “Toots” and “Hans.”

Mom, as I still am wont to call her, while raising three young rapscallions, took up her singing career and pursued it in earnest with Madame and Maestro Bigali. But she still made sure that she had time for her kids. When we came home from Little Flower School for lunch, not only were we served a great meal, but like the lector in a monastery refectory, she would read to us some of the classics. Music was also a great part of our training as each Saturday morning we listened as Milton Cross introduced the Metropolitan Opera of the week.

On August 25, 1947, Mark Wolff was born in the midst of a thunder storm, and Maris came in 1950 on May 20 in milder weather. Mom realized at one point that raising all these kids, and spending time with her lessons and singing, she needed some help around the house. Thus, she came to hire a young lady in her teens, one Mary Anne Kane, who lived only two blocks away. She did a very nice job but wanted to move on to other things so she handed the baton to her younger sister Christine. Chris became like a sister to us boys and a daughter to Mom. She had the good sense at the end of high school to marry another neighborhood man, a naval reservist and budding scholar, Don Costello. After he got his PhD in English from the University of Chicago, he took a job at the University of our Lady of the Lake, otherwise called Notre Dame, where he stayed his entire career. They kept in touch with Mom and Dad even to hosting them in Europe where Don did some work as a visiting scholar in the 70’s.

Mom not only took voice but she taught voice as well and as was her personality she became fast friends with clients, especially Bernadette Ryan and Helen Lindenberg. Bernadette died an untimely death but Helen came out to New Jersey. Her husband, Bill, was part of Dad’s Jersey Crane Company before the Lindenbergs moved to Canada.

In 1952 Mom and Dad moved to NY, the hub for those who worked in classical music. Mom adopted another name at that time and made an appearance at Carnegie Hall under the name of Nicole Scott. Now in those days Nicole was not a common name for young ladies, but after she adopted it, we all know that in the ensuing years it became widely bestowed on infant girls around the country. Its diminutive, Nicki, became the cognomen of those involved in her professional life or those who first met her later in life.

On October 5, 1956, she got another name, “Nanny,” when Sandra Walters Wolff, wife of Philip, gave birth to Philip John the second. It was PJ, as he came to be called, that dubbed his paternal grandmother with the name Nanny. In my humble opinion, this was her favorite name as she soon became the grandmother of a large brood of 18 grandchildren. Three of those were Maureen’s kids prior to our marriage, but they were treated as graciously and lovingly as were her blood descendents. They remarked so to me in response to the sad news of May 19.

When Marc moved to Great Britain in the early 70’s, he became after a few years, quite British in his accent and so to Lin and their kids Mom became Mum.As she finished the days of her life she came to Vermont and under the loving watch of Philip, Ellen, Maris, and the caregivers of Copley Manor, she was able to enter her 96^th year.

Now perhaps as she mingles in Eternity, she has gained her greatest name as one of the Saints above. If you need anything, she would be the one to ask; for she will prevail on our behalf with the Lord above as she did for all of us when she supported us here on earth. Thanks, Mom, for everything. And if I didn’t do the pictures right, please don’t yell at me.

What we do in Rwanda

2010-07-06T12:15:00.001-07:00

I hope this four-minute video (produced pro-bono by our friends at 4-minute Media) will give you a good sense of the work we are doing in Rwanda with Karisimbi Business Partners. If you're interested in financially partnering with us, please go to http://www.karisimbipartners.com/friends-family.html

An Artist You Should Know About

2010-05-28T04:07:00.000-07:00

For Christmas this year, my husband bought me a beautiful peace of artwork by a local Rwandan artist. It is the only artwork hanging in our home and I love it. It is semi-abstract, which is different for me, but it depicts the beauty and grace of the people we came to work alongside. I hope you'll read more of Bosco's story and check out his work at www.bakunziart.com.

Jean Bosco Bakunzi (1985- ) Bosco, as the artist prefers to be known, was born at CHK Hospital in Kigali, Rwanda. He grew up in Kigali, attending two primary schools in the city. His father was Catholic and his mother Protestant, but he describes his father in a word as “modern”. This atmosphere undoubtedly allowed Bosco to develop freely as a child and laid the seeds for him later to become a self-trained artist.

When you first meet Bosco, he strikes you as an optimistic, carefree young man. However, his experiences in 1994, when both of his parents were killed, have sharpened his sense of justice and honed his desire to help others through his art. He lived in an orphanage for two years after the death of his parents. It was here that Bosco created craft projects with a volunteer from France as his first structured foray into the world of art. The Kigali native says that while at the orphanage he would use pen and pastels to make cartoons to express himself and his friends would follow his lead.

He continues to give art classes twice a week to the children who live at the same orphanage today. Bosco believes that creating art can heal one “emotionally, physically, and mentally”. He lives this every day as he uses art to help orphans deal with emotions and express themselves. Gisimba Memorial Center also gains from this young artist’s enthusiasm for children where he teaches arts and crafts to young people under a project called “Imena Art for Kids”. And one imagines that he also continues to experience healing through his own art.

After leaving the orphanage, Bosco attended two high schools in Butare, Rwanda. He was, however, drawn back to the city of his birth. In Kigali in 2004, Bosco started meeting professional artists. He began to talk to the artists around him about such things as mixing colors. He also began to absorb ideas and concepts from the world’s great artists such as Van Gogh and Picasso. After communing with Picasso’s great works both in books and on the Internet, he began to paint works in a palette similar to the Spanish artist’s blue period.

Bosco and some of his fellow artists founded “Uburanga” Arts Studio in Kimihurura, which takes its name from the Kinyarwanda word for “beauty”, and is a hotbed of fledgling young Rwandan artists. He also continues to develop his talents with his membership in Isoko Arts Rwanda, an association of Rwandan fine artists.

Bosco work takes a variety of forms: paint and mixed media. He describes his paintings as “realistic but abstract” as being about nature and people, “something with meaning”. Many of his paintings have a message about social justice for all, while others are about equality for women in particular.

One of his largest paintings, Women in the Market, shows women at the market with baskets and vegetables. He has beautifully abstracted their forms behind a grid of white lines he created by placing the canvas on the floor with strings stretched taught across it. Bosco also digs into his pigment with a comb, creating lyrical circles or even random scratches at times. The artist elevates the commonplace task of the women selling in the market to that of a noble act at the core of Rwandan society. The artist says “women are trying to be a noble” gender in Rwanda. He feels women and children still have not received the place that they deserve and he wants to communicate with them and inspire them.

His mixed media work can not help but make one think of the found objects of Duchamp or Man Ray. One of his most powerful works, Love and Hope, has two tires surrounded by swirls of different shades of green brushstrokes. The tires, utilitarian objects from every day life, here beautifully symbolize movement for the artist and for the viewer and the brushstrokes elegantly carry through with this idea. He said he was inspired to create this piece on a trip to Nairobi. He went with friends to talk about life and love.

Continuing in this Dada-esque style, Bosco creates amusing and whimsical portraits using pockets from pants for faces, and then cloth, bottle caps, nails, and wire for the details. Upon first glance, you notice the figure, and then with a second glance you notice the found objects used to make the form. When you realize you are looking at the pocket from someone’s old jeans in his work African Queen, (shown above) you almost laugh to yourself. They say the definition of humor is surprise or not finding what you expected.

That is true not only of Bosco’s work, but also of him as a person. If one simply read the details of his life, one might expect to find someone who is hardened against the world. Instead, one finds an artist who sees the good in the world and other people and wants to help amplify that through his art, his teaching, and his studio.

Valerie Ficklin, M.A.
Art Historian

Exhibitions:

Solo Exhibitions:

2009
The Feelings, Kigali International Airport
My Dream, Heaven Restaurant

Group Exhibitions:

2009
Saint Patrick’s Day Exhibition presented by the Irish Embassy of Uganda, Serena Hotel
Jazz Band for Peace: Celebrating Rwanda Commitment for Ending Violence Against Women and Children, Serena Hotel
East Africa Biennale (EASTFAB),Dar es Salaam, Tanzania

2010
Ivuka Arts Studio and Friends, United States Embassy, Kigali, Rwanda
Isoko Arts Rwanda Launching Exhibition, Laico Hotel Umubano

Bosco with Women in the Market, shot at his studio in Kimihurura in May 2010

Adoptions are in a 40% Decline

2010-05-13T10:02:00.000-07:00

I often quote Augustine when he says, "Hope has two daughters - anger and courage; anger at the way things are, courage for the way things can be." I have had some things happen recently that push against my optimism for the future of orphan care - people's personal agendas, government bureaucracies and inefficiencies, and apathy to name a few. However, I am also still naive enough - even at 38 years old - to believe that we can do more to care for the orphan, that people really do desire what is best for children, that systemic change takes time, but it is worth it. This blog from my friend, Tom Davis, cites that adoptions are in a 40% decline. Considering the fact that adoptions account for less than a tenth of a percent of all orphans worldwide, this is discouraging. My heart gets angry, but then I feel the courage setting in.

My heart is for the children left behind - for the little girl I held yesterday during my weekly volunteer times at Home for Hope. Many of the children seemed a little under the weather, that happens in orphanages with 100 plus children. But her face was so despondent. She would not engage at all. She just stood in the corner, crying quietly, with food dripping out of her mouth. She is four years old. I tried to get her to eat some of her food, but it wouldn't stay. She never moved. But when I held her, she wouldn't let go. And so I held her, I prayed for her, I whispered in her ear, "Uri umwana mwiza - you are a good and beautiful child" - "Imana urukundo - God loves you." I do believe in evil. I do believe there is an Enemy to God the creator. And every week, when I hold and rock these children, I whisper words of truth into their ears, claiming that evil will have no say in the hearts and minds of these children. But I also know so much damage has been done already. So I want to be about helping find ways to nurture the hearts and minds of these orphans who will never be adopted. I'll wrote more on this later, but if you haven't read any of Dr. Karyn Purvis' work, I encourage you to do so. These children need more than whispered words and weekly hugs. They need courageous people to take a deep breath and pray for the courage to keep fighting on their behalf.

**********
Adoptions are in a 40% Decline

With 150 million orphans in the world, we should be seeing a dramatic increase in the number of orphans who are adopted every year in the United States. But sadly, the opposite is true. Adoptions have been decreasing every year since 2004.

A new article in the May edition of Christianity Today says this, "Since 2004, these and other restrictions have resulted in a 40 percent decline in overseas adoptions by Americans—from an all-time high of almost 23,000 in 2004 to fewer than 12,800 in 2009, according to the U.S. State Department."

Although there are some incredible people who understand God's heart for adoption, they are still the minority when it comes to this issue. If 7% of those claiming to be Christians adopted one child, all 150 million orphans would have homes.

Second, the battle continues to rage over the lives of orphans around the world. Make no mistake about it, "our enemy, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour," I Peter 5:8. Orphans are easy targets.

My friend Jedd Medefind from The Christian Alliance for Orphans had this to say, "The drop in international adoptions since 2004 does not signal a stagnating willingness among American families to adopt overseas, and he argues that evangelicals in particular have increased interest."

I would say this is absolutely true. With almost 1,500 people at Summit VI in Minneapolis April 29 & 30, people are more passionate than every about adoption and orphan care.

The reality is that we still have a lot to do. Orphans are worth the fight. We have to press through government regulations, fear, and spiritual warfare to care for the least of these. This is God's heart and it should be the heart of every Christian.

"A Father to the Fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families." Psalm 68:5,6

More photos...

2010-03-31T14:05:00.000-07:00

Silas, my Kinyarwandan tutor, is so excited to welcome Nathanael. He will be officiating at Nathanael's Rwandan naming ceremony on April 17. We've tried to explain to our friends that Nathanael has to attach to us, so we don't let anyone hold him except us. However, our Rwandan friends don't understand that at alla nd literally just take the baby from our arms.

Usually he smiles when Lian plays with him, but I couldn't quite catch him on camera when he did. Lian is a great helper for her little brother.

"Son, I think we need to have a little man to man conversation."

The overprotective sister already.

Photos from Nathanael's First Days Home

2010-03-31T13:35:00.000-07:00

Here is our wide-eyed wonder. He loves those two fingers.

Laurel Greer, Christina and Alana from 4 for More, an organization committed to coming alongside Rwanda's orphans by providing clean water to orphanages and supporting adoptive parents, came to visit. Laurel's husband, Peter, is the director of Hope International, a microfinance organization that also works in Rwanda. Laurel and Peter adopted their son, Myles, last yaer. It was so fun to meet them.

Sleepy baby. He was awake every two to three hours for the first five days. Then last night he slept through the night. We were so grateful.

Devoted Sister. Anna loves to play with her baby brother.

Video of Nathanael's Adoption

2010-03-26T04:10:00.000-07:00

We visited Nathanael five times before the day we were allowed to take him home. Here is a video of yesterday's homecoming.

Welcome Nathanael Niyonzima Jukanovich!

2010-03-25T12:06:00.000-07:00

We are pleased to announce that Nathanael Niyonzima Jukanovich is home with our family. We started this process officially on August 6 with our homestudy. Received our approval in record time from Immigration and the RWanda embassy on September 29. Submitted our dossier on October 14 after we had moved to Rwanda. Received our non-objection letter on January 19. Received our match on March 15. And here we are - the week of my birthday - receiving him into our home on March 25. We are overjoyed and feel very complete.

I was able to go the sector office last Thursday to fill out our act of adoption. We received our court date for today and I asked if I could attend the hearing. It was very brief, but we asked the judge if he would complete the judgment today - usually it takes at least one day. I was still under the impression we would have to then take the judgment to the Minister's office, receive a travel letter and then bring that to the orphanage, so was hoping for a Friday homecoming at best - braced myself for Monday. However, the attorneys that were present there told me that onec that judgment is signed, the child is ours. It is up to the nuns however if the child can stay the night. Technically they need to have that letter from the Minister. He said yes and we showed up at 2 pm to receive the judgment. Of course, nothing is as simple as receiving the judgment and go to the orphanage. We had to first drive to the district office nearby to find out the bank account to which we would have to pay 800 RWF to purchase copies of the judgment. Then we had to go to the bank and pay the fee and today there were very long lines. Then we had to drive back to the district office to hand in our payment - again another long line (Rwandans are scurrying to get their identity cards finalized for the election this summer). I pulled the Muzungu with two small children card (which was really true - my kids would not have lasted another five minutes in that crowd) and found myself at the front of the line with a nice woman. Of course, then we had to have the bank receipt photocopied before handing in the receipt. Finally got that done and headed back to court. Got the judgment, then ran to the printers to get the documents printed for the orphanage's files. We started at 2 and by 4:45 pm we were standing at the orphanage with Sister Catherine and Sister Teresa so excited to welcome us.

After visiting Niyonzima for the past week, it was such a joy to look at him and tell him he was coming home forever. The girls were so excited and were already telling me they had his bottle, could help situate his blanket, and they are trying to understand why it is so important that mommy is the only one who holds him right now.

His name came to us as we were reading the first book of John with Caroline the other night. Jesus is calling his disciples and he says to Nathanael,"Here is an Israelite in whom there is nothing false." Nathanael asks him, " How do you know me?" And Jesus replies, "I saw you while you were still under the fig tree, before Philip called you." Having adopted three children now, Dano and I would both say that we really do believe the Creator of the universe knows his children by name. He knew our son before we even called him to be a part of our family. Amazing. Nathanael also means gift of God. He truly is.

He has already had his first bottle, first bath, and first bedtime story. There is still more paperwork to be done - medical exam, Ministry travel approval, passport, etc., but for this evening we will focus on the grander scheme of things and simply relish in this new life that has joined our family. Life has changed...for the better.

We Have a Court Date!!!

2010-03-23T02:42:00.001-07:00

We received our referral last Tuesday, March 16. I volunteer at the orphanage every Wednesday, so they told me I could visit with Nyunzima Moses on Wednesday. Dano came with me just in case they did let us meet him. He is precious. Eyes full of wonder. Whenever I would sing to him, he would tap me on the back. He has beautiful long fingers and long eyelashes. He seems very tiny to me for 9 months, but we'll know more once we have him checked out by the pediatrician here.

Since then I've been able to visit with him four times, feeding him his bottles of millet and milk, and each time it gets harder to place him back in his crib next to the other 20 infants. He has cried when I've placed him down, which breaks my heart. I sang the song to him that I still sing to my daughters when I leave for a trip,

This momma comes back, I always come back, I always come back to get you
This momma comes back, I always come back, I never will forget you.

Yesterday we were able to introduce him to his sisters. I so wish I could post pictures, but that will have to wait a few more days. They were so excited to see him. Anna wanted to feed him and take care of him. Lian wanted to feel his fingers and toes, measuring them against hers, playing silling games with him and reading to him. And when they left the room to play outside, he seemed to be searching for them. I had the hardest time feeding him yesterday because he just wanted to turn his head towards their voices. I felt complete.

Today we received word that our court appointment is for Thursday morning at 8 am. I've been scrambling the past few days to get all of our docs notarized and to the appropriate offices - nothing is simple. Hopefully we will hear that he is ours by Friday morning, if not sooner. The Sisters said we could bring him home when we have the court approval since I've been visiting him almost every day.

Stay tuned : )

The Miracles of Access

2010-03-07T01:33:00.000-08:00

This weekend has been one of so many emotions – on Friday evening I was finalizing my mother-in-law's eulogy, while also painting a lion's head for a prop for my daughter's 7th birthday; on Saturday evening, I was literally placed in the front row for the funeral via a laptop and Skype and my connection was only disconnected once in three hours (a major miracle here). I was able to cry and laugh with my family and friends as we reminisced about the life of Dano's mom. This morning, I had the incredible honor of witnessing miracles take place through Operation Smile – one miracle will effect the future of my two-year old neighbor, Claudina. I am so full of joy right now that I had to share this with a broader audience.

Claudina

is my neighbor. She is often at our home with her brother, Pierre, and five year old sister, Diani. When Claudina was only a month or two old, she was laying in her bed in their one room home. Diani was only three years old and accidentally knocked over the oil lamp that lights their home (there is no electricity for their home even though they live two doors down from us). The petrol fell on her bed, lighting it on fire. Her mom was outside, but ran in and was thankfully able to save her, but her right arm was completely burned. It is deformed now as the skin continually contracts, thus pulling her wrist inwards towards her arm. If she can't use her hand, she can't write or cook, thus she can't pursue an education, and she has no future.

Three months ago, we were introduced through a friend to Beth and Robert Riviello who are doctors from Boston. Robert is a burn and trauma surgeon. They were volunteering with Partners in Health in Rwanda and while here they also received their adopted son. It was beautiful to witness what they do. When I found out about Claudina's arm, I just asked Robert for his advice since he was here and this is his specialty. He asked me if he could come and see her wounds for himself. He did this the day before they left Rwanda and as they were in the midst of finalizing their adoption. We visited

Claudina, he saw the wounds, and I saw him take his own arm, form it in a crooked fashion and then straighten it out slowly, telling her mother that he would take her arm from its current state and make it whole. I couldn't believe it – what if he couldn't, he was leaving, were we making false promises? But he said no, he had a plastic surgeon friend who was coming in July and he thought he could do the surgery.

This morning we met with that surgeon. He was in Rwanda with Operation Smile, so four months before he'll come back with Partners in Health. Operation Smile was doing a clinic for cleft palates, but he thought they could fit in her surgery and he asked us to come to their screening. I have been to medical clinics in the States, but have never experienced anything like I saw this morning.

After only one day of seeing patients, we were number 233. And there were at least another hundred people waiting outside, if

not more. Children and adults with cleft palates, a 10 month old whose head had a huge hole in it and whose face was completely burned on one side, overwhelming. I was there with my girls and I had forewarned them that they might see some really sick people. But in the midst of that place, I turned to my girls and said, “This is a place of miracles.” This place is giving people hope, it is changing their lives. These doctors are miracle workers and what was wonderful is there were Western and African doctors volunteering.

They truly are working miracles. Yesterday as I was finalizing pick-up time with Claudina and her mom, Clementine, a neighbor stopped by. Last month a neighbor had told me that if this surgery worked Claudina would have a future. Yesterday, a neighbor came by and said no one would marry Claudina because she was deformed. I didn't know what to say, but I told her I believed that the good husband would see her heart and that we were working to correct her crooked arm. She didn't believe us. I can't wait for her to see the transformed Claudina.

The plastic surgeon told me and her mom today that her arm can be fixed. It will require much aftercare – she will have to wear a splint for up to six months to straighten the arm and she will have skin grafts that will require much attention, but it can be done. Her surgery will be this Tuesday or Wednesday. Her mom cannot believe this is happening.

As Westerners, we often do not realize how much access we have just because of the friendships we have. It was a friend from Boston who connected us to the Riviellos, who connected us to Steve Naum, the plastic surgeon. We are connected to such educated and accomplished people who are using their skills to serve the poorest of the poor. And in return we have the privilege of seeing miracles happen. I am overwhelmed and humbled by that reality.

Embracing the Wait

2010-02-17T03:47:00.001-08:00

Waiting is an activity with impressive documentation throughout Scripture, yet it’s
astonishingly ignored in most constructs of how to live the Christian life. Waiting isn’t a
passive occupation but an active and hopeful orientation toward the activity of God for which
there’s no present evidence. Refusal to wait is a refusal to trust. Paul never counseled
passivity or quietism. He did, however, commend the hopeful waiting that expects Christ to
save the day- not only at the Second Coming, but in all daily comings where he shows up in
our lives, offering salvation from one kind of doom or another, whether a doomed marriage or
a doomed business or simply a doomed attitude.
-Eugene Peterson Conversations: The Message with its Translator (pg 1858)

I lost my cool this week. Two weeks ago, the Mother Superior at the orphanage told me she was choosing our son the next day and submitting the match to the Minister's office that Friday. Soon after that the person appointed as the adoption coordinator resigned. I was told the replacement would be there last Friday, then Monday, then Wednesday. So on Monday, as I sat patiently in the Minister's reception room, my friend suggested that I confirm that the Sisters did indeed send in our paperwork. Turns out they had not - problems with the notary, problems with the replacement, too many families adopting. And my heart plummeted. All this time I thought the papers were in the Minister's hand just awaiting the replacement coordinator, but they still hadn't even been notarized. I expressed my disappointment to the Mother Superior and was told to, "Be Patient."

"Be Patient." As this is my third adoption in seven years, I have truly sought to be patient, but for some reason I couldn't quite handle those words on that day. I wasn't rude, but I wasn't pleasant. I felt like I was being made the bad guy. If a doctor ever told a pregnant woman that she had to carry her child for another term because the doctor just wasn't prepared to handle her delivery, you bet she would fight and find a way to give birth to that child. Yet, often adoptive parents are called, "impatient, headstrong, annoying." It's true. But we're really not. We just want the longing of our heart and the longing of our child's heart to be fulfilled.

Today is Ash Wednesday, a day to reflect upon the start of Lent, to confess and seek forgiveness. I open up the first page of a Lenten devotional a friend compiled and read this section on waiting. In spite of my feeling self-righteous in how I responded to the Sisters, I know, deep down, that I was wrong, that I am not trusting, that I am seeking control. Why is it so hard to give that up? And so I seek forgiveness, I relinquish control, and I wait. I pray our son will come soon and I know he has already been chosen, so he will. Until then, I will change my attitude. I will pray for the Sisters who bathe and clothe and feed and clean up after not only these small children, but widows and handicapped men and women. I will trust the One who guards my child at night, that He will truly save the day.

Quick Adoption Update

2010-02-08T09:13:00.000-08:00

Last Monday we were told by the Mother Superior that our son would be chosen on Tuesday. He has been chosen for us, but we will not know who he is until the Ministry of Gender approves the Sister's selection. Apparently they can tell them "no." This is fine, except that the woman in charge of the adoption office at the Ministry just resigned last week. Needless to say we were discouraged. I went to the office and was told she would have a replacement by today. We are going to go to the office on Wednesday to see if someone did replace her and if so, if they will place their stamp of approval on our son. It is very difficult living just ten minutes from the orphanage, volunteering there every Wednesday and not being able to know who he is. Please pray for our patience.

The Waiting Game

2010-01-30T03:13:00.000-08:00

We received the wonderful news that the Rwandan government has approved our application to adopt a son from Rwanda. In their letter, they ask for our patience as it takes about two months for them to select our son. When I've talked with the woman in charge in person, she has "promised" me we will have him before my mother comes to visit on April 1. So now we wait.

If I have learned anything by becoming a parent through adoption it is patience. We waited 18 months to receive Lian; 2 1/2 years to receive Anna. To know that we may receive our son within seven months of even starting the process is incredible to me. When we first did our homestudy in August and received our approval from immigration within a month of that, we were in shock at how fast things were going. My mother said to me, "There is a reason this is moving so quickly for you - this little boy can't wait."

I remember breaking down into tears every time we learned there was another delay in Lian's adoption, but when we had to wait so long for Anna, my heart was literally close to breaking. Why did it have to take this long to care for a child who needs a home? Yet, now, knowing our Anna...I know she was indeed to be our daughter and I would wait another 2 1/2 years if I knew it would take that to receive this particular little girl. This is the same for Lian. I look at the two of them individually and together and while I see their uniqueness, I also see the incredible way they are truly "our" daughters - the way Lian thinks so strategically and lists out rational arguments, along with the way she really needs her space after being surrounded by people is completely her father. And then there's Anna who has to be with people in order to feel energized, who loves to organize and use her imagination - very much her mother. Adoptive parents say that all the time - this was meant to be. But it really is true.

And I hold onto that. I hold onto the fact that these children were destined for us as we were for them. Because sometimes it is difficult. Sometimes the root fear of abandonment digs its ugly claws into your child's heart; sometimes the fact that they were never held or touched for the first year of their life escalates their emotions in ways that can harm them and others; sometimes when you leave for an hour meeting, your child makes you sing to her the song "This momma comes back, she always comes back, she always comes back to get you. This momma comes back, she always comes back, she never will forget you."

So we wait for our new son....as with any biological child, we have no idea what to expect. But I trust that in the divine ordination of events that has brought us thus far, we will receive a little boy who is perfect for our family and our family for him. He may have wounds that are deep. He may not. But what we can promise him is that he will be loved and treasured. We can promise him he has a future and a hope.

Our Basic Human Pleasures: Food, Sex and Giving

2010-01-19T02:12:00.001-08:00

Op-Ed Columnist

Our Basic Human Pleasures: Food, Sex and Giving

By NICHOLAS D. KRISTOF

Published: January 16, 2010

Want to be happier in 2010? Then try this simple experiment, inspired by recent scholarship in psychology and neurology. Which person would you rather be:

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Fred R. Conrad/The New York Times

Nicholas D. Kristof

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Nicholas Kristof addresses reader feedback and posts short takes from his travels.

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Times Topics: Philanthropy

Richard is an ambitious 36-year-old white commodities trader in Florida. He’s healthy and drop-dead handsome, lives alone in a house with a pool, and has worked his way through a series of gorgeous women. Richard’s job is stressful, but he spent Christmas in Tahiti. Unencumbered, he also has time to indulge such passions as reading (right now he’s finishing a book called “Half the Sky”), marathon running and writing poetry. In the last few days, he has been composing an elegy about the Haiti earthquake.

Lorna is a 64-year-old black woman in Boston. She’s overweight and unattractive, even after a recent nose job. Lorna is on regular dialysis, but that doesn’t impede her active social life or babysitting her grandchildren. A retired school assistant, she is close to her 67-year-old husband and is much respected in her church for directing the music committee and the semiannual blood drive. Lorna believes in tithing (giving 10 percent of her income to charity or the church) and in the last few days has organized a church drive to raise $10,000 for earthquake relief in Haiti.

I adapted those examples from ones that Jonathan Haidt, a psychology professor at the University of Virginia, develops in his fascinating book, “The Happiness Hypothesis.” His point is that while most of us might prefer to trade places with Richard, Lorna is probably happier.

Men are no happier than women, and people in sunny areas no happier than people in chillier climates. The evidence on health is complex, but even chronic health problems (like those requiring dialysis) may have surprisingly little long-term effect on happiness, because we adjust to them. Beautiful people aren’t happier than ugly people, although cosmetic surgery does seem to leave patients feeling brighter. Whites are happier than blacks, but only very slightly. And young people are actually a bit less happy than older folks, at least up to age 65.

Lorna has a few advantages over Richard. She has less stress and is respected by her peers — factors that make us feel good. Happiness is tied to volunteering and to giving blood, and people with religious faith tend to be happier than those without. A solid marriage is linked to happiness, as is participation in social networks. And one study found that people who focus on achieving wealth and career advancement are less happy than those who focus on good works, religion or spirituality, or friends and family.

“Human beings are in some ways like bees,” Professor Haidt said. “We evolved to live in intensely social groups, and we don’t do as well when freed from hives.”

Happiness is, of course, a complex concept and difficult to measure, and John Stuart Mill had a point when he suggested: “It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied than a fool satisfied.”

But in any case, nobility can lead to happiness. Professor Haidt notes that one thing that can make a lasting difference to your contentment is to work with others on a cause larger than yourself.

I see that all the time. I interview people who were busy but reluctantly undertook some good cause because (sigh!) it was the right thing to do. Then they found that this “sacrifice” became a huge source of fulfillment and satisfaction.

Brain scans by neuroscientists confirm that altruism carries its own rewards. A team including Dr. Jorge Moll of the National Institutes of Health found that when a research subject was encouraged to think of giving money to a charity, parts of the brain lit up that are normally associated with selfish pleasures like eating or sex.

The implication is that we are hard-wired to be altruistic. To put it another way, it’s difficult for humans to be truly selfless, for generosity feels so good.

“The most selfish thing you can do is to help other people,” says Brian Mullaney, co-founder of Smile Train, which helps tens of thousands of children each year who are born with cleft lips and cleft palates. Mr. Mullaney was a successful advertising executive, driving a Porsche and taking dates to the Four Seasons, when he felt something was missing and began volunteering for good causes. He ended up leaving the business world to help kids smile again — and all that makes him smile, too.

So at a time of vast needs, from Haiti to our own cities, here’s a nice opportunity for symbiosis: so many afflicted people, and so much benefit to us if we try to help them. Let’s remember that while charity has a mixed record helping others, it has an almost perfect record of helping ourselves. Helping others may be as primal a human pleasure as food or sex.

•

Great Valentine's Gift

2010-01-15T03:55:00.000-08:00

From Tom Davis of Children's Hope Chest
*****
Hey Everyone,

Are you ready for Valentines Day?

Here's a sneak peek at our Valentines Day initiative called "Shirts for Shoes." We've partnered up with Kari Gibson's "Simply Love" project to bring real love to orphans in Ethiopia. Check out the link:

http://mycrazyadoption.org/hopechest-valentines-day-project-ethiopia-shirts-for-shoes

PLUS...each shirt sold will provide a new pair of shoes and a shirt to an orphan in Ethiopia enrolled in a HopeChest program.

These shirts are HopeChest-exclusive, limited edition T's made special for this Valentine's Day. The store opens tomorrow morning, so please let your networks know about this great opportunity today!

Each T-shirt makes a great Valentines Day gift for your loved ones (sizes run youth through adult, and we have fitted T's for women).

Check it out now:

http://mycrazyadoption.org/hopechest-valentines-day-project-ethiopia-shirts-for-shoes

We'll bring you the link to the full store tomorrow so you can order your shirt and pass along the good news.

Thanks!
HopeChest, Simply Love, & the Shirts for Shoes Team

What I Love About Living in Rwanda

2010-01-13T12:07:00.000-08:00

It is easy to write about the difficult things we've experienced here, but this week I have found myself struck by the incredible gift it is to live in this beautiful country. So here are my top ten reasons why I love Rwanda:

1) The lush green hills and vast valleys.
2) When you ask for directions, strangers just jump in your car to show you the way, happy to have helped you and you're not afraid.
3) Children respect their elders.
4) Celebrating the New Year is being grateful for being alive rather than being sad for what the old year didn't bring.
5) You don't have to be a gardener to have things grow. You just stick something in the ground and somehow it turns into something beautiful. That is my kind of gardening.
6) I cook a lot more from scratch and somehow it is therapeutic to make homemade chicken broth every week.
7) Even when you're busy, it just doesn't carry the same stress it seemed to carry in the U.S.
8) There just isn't anything to do for kids (except Caroline's Ballet Rwanda class), so my kids have become so much more creative with limited toys and each other's best playmate and we play a lot more games as a family.
9) When the rain comes, you are grateful and refreshed.
10) People dance and sing without inhibition.

and that's my list for today...

Consider giving to Children's Hope Chest

2009-12-31T23:23:00.000-08:00

Check out this message from Tom Davis -
http://tomdavis.typepad.com/tom_daviss_blog/2009/12/counting-down-to-midnight.html

To Know Him is to Know Peace

2009-12-25T12:51:00.001-08:00

This is a posting I just wrote for our Karisimbi Partners blog. You can read more about our work with Karisimbi Business Partners.

**************

We were only there to deliver a gift. What we received in return was nothing like I expected.

All three Karisimbi Partner families have always believed in committing the ‘first fruits’ of our labor, which is why it did not seem strange to want to donate a portion of the first company paycheck. It was not a huge amount, but somehow it just felt right to give a tenth of our earnings to an organization that honors those trying to rebuild after the genocide. In particular, we wanted to support an organization that encourages entrepreneurship. We decided on Amani Ava Hejuru, an organization committed to helping marginalized women in Africa find peace with God and one another. They focus on relationship-building while giving the women sewing and marketing skills. Their products represent excellence.

We wanted to buy three beautiful baskets made from fabric scraps. It seemed symbolic –first fruits are gathered in a basket, and our first fruits would support the business of women making baskets. Our donation could buy three baskets with surplus funds for purchasing a quilting machine that would allow them to produce more products. I communicated with Grace, the Managing Director, and was invited to their workplace. Upon arrival, their workshop appeared to be a small garage converted into a space for eleven sewing machines. Greg and Kristen Urquhart came as well (we have all since decided that the next time we present such a gift, we must all be present). We said some brief remarks and went to leave. Beata, who manages the store, asked if she could sing us a song. The drumbeats started. Her beautiful voice rang out. The others joined in. Hands began to raise and bodies began to sway. Three of the women began to dance the traditional Ingonza dance. Translated from Kinyarwanda, the following words filled that small space with such joy it moved me to tears. “Your husband cannot give you peace, your neighbor cannot give you peace, your friends cannot give you peace, your job cannot give you peace....only Jesus can give you peace.” In a way, this is a Christmas message… one that they sing and feel all year long.

These are words sung by women who lost their husbands during the genocide in horrific ways – often at the hands of their neighbors. They know what can and cannot give you peace. Where we thought our gift was small, to them it was another way Jesus was showing his love to them. And they celebrated that recognition through song and dance, completely uninhibited. I felt I was standing on holy ground. My three-year-old daughter, Anna, was hugging my leg as she listened. I said a silent prayer that she would remember this and someday be able to receive the gifts in her life with the joy and peace these women embodied.

We have the privilege of access – access to education, resources, networks. With this privilege comes responsibility. These women have received the gift of life – a second chance. Rwanda has received the gift of a second chance. We have the privilege to serve with what we hold in our hands. We also have the privilege to receive what this country extends to us.

The Joy in Telling a Child His Mom and Dad are Coming

2009-12-23T01:25:00.000-08:00

Kristin and I have decided to volunteer at Home for Hope orphanage on Wednesdays. After my first visit, I just couldn't go back. I told myself it was because of time, but if I was honest I know it was because it was just too difficult for me to know my son is there and I can't see him. Yet, over the past several weeks, I've felt my heart shift so that I am emotionally ready to engage with the other children who may never be adopted. I had made plans to go today. A few days ago, I received an email from some friends of friends who just received word that they have a son and he is two years old. I asked them if I could visit him on their behalf. Of course, they said yes.

So today, after spending a few minutes playing on the see-saws with a dozen or so little ones, I asked the helper if she knew Isaiah (just learned I am not allowed to post his Rwandan name). As soon as she pointed to him, I recognized him from the pictures. What a child of strength. It was such a joy for me to tell him in Kinyarwandan that I am friends with his forever mom and dad and that they are coming soon to get him. I was able to play with him, help feed him, and just watch and observe this precious boy.

He ate in a room I hadn't been in before. In the room were five handicapped little boys all in one crib. Their legs are crippled and for some they cannot even sit up. My heart broke for these little ones. There was a woman there from Burundi who was volunteering and so I joined her in feeding and holding these precious little ones. Angelo was the one with whom I spent the most time. Judging by his facial features and size, I would guess he may be as old as four years old, but he is still eating out of a bottle and cannot stand, nor can he speak. I asked if I could hold him and the helpers were so sweet to change him, put on nice clothes and then let me hold him. At first he was so animated and I tried to hold him up so he could at least move his legs. Then they gave me a bottle with which to feed him. I rocked him like a baby and just sang these words, "You are loved. You are loved. You are loved." to the tune of an old worship song called "You are Lord." I could feel his body relaxing in my arms. I kept looking into his eyes and telling him, "You are not forgotten. You are loved." I felt like I could stay there forever.

And then my friends were leaving, so I tried to put him back in the crib. He just screamed and cried. I told him I would be back. And I will.

Since I'm such a blog-slacker

2009-12-14T09:51:00.000-08:00

I can't really explain it. Maybe it's that I have seen and experienced so much in the past few weeks that it is hard for me to know where to begin. Or maybe it's just the reality of having a very, very busy three year old who always wants to be a part of whatever I am doing, so sitting down to write a thoughtful blog posting just doesn't happen; or maybe it's because the night is so dark, the heat is so hot and I seem to fall asleep much earlier than I did in the States; or maybe it's just that I"m lazy. The bottomline is that I haven't blogged in weeks, but my friends and colleagues have. So if you're interested in general life and work here, and don't want to wait for me to get around to posting, please check out:

http://carolinejoan.blogspot.com/ - Caroline lives with us here in Kigali. I've known her since she was a baby and am super proud of the dance school she's launched called Ballet Rwanda.

http://www.urquharts.wordpress.com/ - Greg and Kristen are one third of our partnership with Karisimbi Business Partners.

http://www.karisimbipartners.blogspot.com/ - Our company's weekly blog.

A Megaphone of 1000 Voices

2009-12-08T01:25:00.000-08:00

I serve on the board of Children's Hope Chest and want to share this letter from its CEO, Tom Davis.
**************
Dear Friends,

While I love Christmas more than any other time of year, I’m already thinking about 2010 and I want to share that vision with you. And, I want you to share it with everyone you know.

Our team set the goal of raising $500,000 to reach another 5,000 orphaned children in 2010. We’re raising these funds so that…

> Fewer young girls are forced to trade sex for food

> More orphans will have food to eat, and the protection and love of Christian mentors

> No girl will end up in the commercial sex trade

The enemy preys upon orphans like this day after day after day. I’ve seen our enemy; he goes by names like AIDS, extreme poverty, and sexual trafficking. He robs children of their parents, their dreams, and their dignity. Who will stop this? It must be us!

Today I am on a mission to raise $500,000 and I can’t do it without you. Will you help by visiting http://www.HopeChestPartners.org and sign up as a $25/month partner today?

Your donation will feed orphans in Africa and rescue them from extreme poverty. Your gifts will support lifechanging programs for girls in Russia that help prevent sex trafficking and forced prostitution.

These are CRITICAL gifts that form the foundation of our programs. Without that foundation, we could never have grown to reach 10,000, and sit poised to reach another 5,000 next year. It is those gifts, your gifts, that make the difference.

For the Fatherless,

Tom Davis

The Calling of Motherhood

2009-11-17T09:58:00.000-08:00

So I am not going to write, but instead allow this essay to speak to the many thoughts I have about motherhood. I thought it was really well-written. And I love the quote by G.K. Chesterton from his book, What is Wrong with the World:

"How can it be a large career to tell other people's children about the Rule of Three, and a small career to tell one's own children about the universe? How can it be broad to be the same thing to everyone, and narrow to be everything to someone? No. A woman's function is laborious, but because it is gigantic, not because it is minute. I will pity Mrs. Jones for the hugeness of her task; I will never pity her for its smallness."

For the full essay: http://www.washingtoninst.org/resources/articles/guest/motherhood-vocation.htm

Visiting my son's home

2009-11-10T10:04:00.000-08:00

When we adopted Lian and Anna, their home seemed far away, their situation unknowable. Now I live in the same city as our son, his home is less than a ten-minute drive from my house. Yet, he is unknowable for now. Is he born yet? I don't know. Yet, what I do know now makes my heart long for him even more.

On Sunday, Kristin and I went to the Home of Hope orphanage, run by the Sisters of Charity in Kigali. We were not allowed to take pictures and I don't think I would anyway. Almost seems to trivialize the reality these children live in. So we went with some teachers from my daughter's school who volunteer there every Sunday. I have been to many orphanages before as a result of our adoptions and my work with Children's Hope Chest, but this was harder than what I've experienced before.

I need to preface my comments by saying that I know the Sisters there are prayerful, dedicated, hard-working and compassionate people. Yet, there are too few of them and too many children. One hundred and twenty children, ages 0-8 live in this home. Volunteers are not allowed in the baby room, unless you are a doctor, so as to keep the babies healthy. However, I could see them through the windows. Crib after crib lined the room - it was overwhelming to me. There had to be sixty cribs, at least. Outside the baby room were the 1-2 year olds, some of whom slept two to a crib in a very small crib. No furniture except the tables at which they all eat their meals. Outside in the courtyard, about forty 3-6 year olds, along with several special needs older children, were playing and getting ready to eat their dinner (a roll and some milk) and take a bath.

I thought I was prepared. I brought a Rwandan soccer ball as I thought that would be fun to play. Lesson learned, unless I had 40 soccer balls, I should not have brought it. The children stormed at us, wanting to be held, wanting to touch our hair and wanting to see what I had in my bag. They tried to grab it off of my arm. I finally got control and tried to play a game, but it was chaotic. They all began climbing on me and not in a fun way. I literally had to cry for help because the smaller children were getting trampled by the older. I just wanted to cry. This was not what I had imagined. And the caregivers (not the nuns) did not seem to know what to do. Finally, I put my bag in hiding, toys away, and just held a few small children, singing and blessing each one.

The smell of urine was everywhere - on the children, on my clothes, on my skin. It was overwhelming to me, yet I couldn't stop holding them. My son could be one of them in a few years. Lord, please hasten our process.

In the meantime, I will hold the children and support those who are coming alongside these children. I've met so many wonderful people who are providing medical care each week to the children, or working to provide material needs for the children. Specifically, another adoptive mom, Laurel Greer has started a non-profit to come alongside this orphanage. She is doing a "Crocs" shoe drive right now, which will be followed by a developmental toys drive. She sends the supplies from the States with other families who are adopting. To learn more, please visit http://four4-more.blogspot.com

My son, you are loved and longed for.

An Umuganda Day

2009-11-02T11:12:00.000-08:00

The last Saturday of every month in Rwanda is called Umuganda Day. From 8 am -12 pm, no cars are supposed to be out in the street, no one is to be working, everyone is to be serving their community, rebuilding their neighborhoods, cleaning up their streets. We decided to participate as a family. There is a ton of trash on our street and the potholes do wonders for our cars. So we decided to pick up trash and try and fill the potholes. Here are a few pictures. We ended up with all the neighbor kids working with us. We gave them oranges afterwards for all their hard work and they devoured them. Afterwards we went to a Fall Festival at Lian's school, followed by another fun party at the Magruders. Lian wanted to be Mulan and Anna was a Hawaiian princess, thanks to Jen and Seng Thor who mailed us our first care package with holiday decorations.
There was a well or cistern of some form full of trash, so I hunkered down ( to the surprise of the children) and started pulling out trash until a cockroach scared me out.
Lian, the hard worker.
Dano and the boys trying to fill the huge ditch at the end of the tarmac.

Anna and her fellow trash picker-uppers.

Just some reflections I had to get on paper....

2009-10-24T12:05:00.000-07:00

It has been fifteen years since the genocide. Rwanda has made tremendous strides toward healing, redemption. I am given the privilege of living in this country – from my front veranda, I can see lush mango, papaya and avocado trees, and the green valley. My children play with Danyire, Jiye, Samuel, Francine, Pierre, JoJo, Benita, Jadit, Christian. The rains pour down in the afternoon, bringing life to the red earth. It is a beautiful country.

I went to a meeting the other day at the Free Methodist church in Gikondo. Good people. Incredible hearts for the handicapped, the widow, the HIV-AIDS victim, the youth. We walk past the old church, being remodeled for a new Bible training center. 165 people were killed there. In cold blood. By their neighbors and friends, sanctioned by their Bishop. I am asked to see the future. To help with the future. Yet, the past is right there in front of me and I find myself fighting tears, seeing ghosts. The dead still speak.

Our security guard and gardener returns home from an evening out. He asks me for permission to return home to the North next week so he can pay his school fees and receive his diploma. He asks me in broken, yet understandable English sentences. I have been paying 8,000 francs ($12 USD) a week to study Kinyarwandan and I still can't have a two sentence conversation with Zechariah. He could not speak more than three words of English three weeks ago, but each night he studies a worn out 1970s textbook the gardener across the street lent him. And he can talk to me. I envy him.

Our househelper, Consolee, can barely stay awake by 3:00 pm. There are no Starbucks runs here. I tell her that she can take an hour break – I had assumed she would. One can't assume. I am the boss. I direct the program. If I don't make it clear that she can take a break, than she doesn't. I want to kick myself for not recognizing this earlier. I ask her when she studies for I know she goes to school six days a week after working for us nine hours a day. She says she wakes up at 3 or 4 am to study, before getting her five children up and ready for school. Her mother died when she was 16, so she had to quit school. Now she is determined to finish. I let her go early that day.

I met a woman on the plane. We are becoming friends, having weekly playdates with our daughters, taking Pilates together. She is Rwandan, but has only spent four months in Rwanda until now. Her family fled in 1959, so she grew up in Uganda. Her family returned to Rwanda after the genocide. She studied in the United States. Her family is of the elite. She asks me when I adopt if I will adopt a Hutu or a Tutsi. I don't hesitate to say, “It will not matter to us.”

The genocide is still the point in time by which everything else is defined here. The country wants to move forward. It is moving forward. I walk by people on the street and wonder what their story is. The number of crippled people here is staggering. No one needs to ask why they are maimed. I truly cannot begin to fathom the depths of the evil done by people to people. It has been fifteen years. My life here is good. We are doing good things to help build the economy. We will be forever connected to this country through our son's blood. My heart cries out for healing for this beautiful land. My soul is humbled by the people I meet. My mind seeks to grasp all I can learn so I can understand the stories of these people through their own language. It has only been three weeks. Time, time....

A little publicity from Gordon College

2009-10-22T12:29:00.000-07:00

My alma mater, Gordon College, actually interviewed me for this back in the Spring, but I just got an email today saying they published it to their blog. Very nice of them.

http://gordoncollegegrapevine.blogspot.com/2009/10/encouraging-small-business-growth-in_22.html

Listen and Learn

2009-10-20T13:05:00.000-07:00

These are the two words I keep hearing in my heart and mind as I live life here in Rwanda. It has been three weeks and if you know me, you know I am a doer. And now I am in a land with plenty of needs for which there is plenty of "doing" to be done. I am friends with so many people who are great "doers" and for whom an immediate need on the street requires immediate action. Yet, I continue to hear the whisperings of "Be Still."

I attended a Bible Study today with other Westerners and the theme was on...yes, "Being Still." The author of the study said the Hebrew word for this expression is "rapah" which literally means to relax, be lazy, be discouraged, be slack, weak." When I've heard or read these words before in Psalm 46, I never viewed them in a negative way. I always thought it mean to just be quiet, relax. But this Hebrew word implies so much more...it requires one to literally give up control. That is what I feel I am to be doing...to give up control of what my ideas are for my time in Rwanda.

"But, wait," I cry. "There are street children and orphans and widows...your word cries out for them, so I should do something now." And, yet, I keep hearing....just listen and learn.

So I have been here three weeks now this evening. While we're still lacking certain furniture and comforts of home, I feel quite settled into life in Kigali. So I want to know what is next. Dano is busy with Karisimbi and I am thrilled by how that is going, but my heart is for the orphan and I want to know what I am supposed to do for the orphan. I met with a wise woman today who has lived in Rwanda for five years and works with African Enterprise. I told her of my struggle and she was so encouraging to me today. She said, "The best thing you could do right now is to listen and learn because you're not just listening and learning for opportunity, you're listening to the culture."

The guys have commented that they are so glad we had several months to just meet with business leaders, organize our thoughts, meet with the leaders again, reorganize our thoughts, meet with them again, etc., because now the final product is so much better and the clients have tremendous buy-in. Every day the guys learn something new about a potential client or Rwandan politics or business and with each lesson comes a better focused direction for our company. I believe that is what is happening with me as I seek to discern how to best serve here.

So I have decided to just start meeting with people who are doing orphan care work, to hear their hearts, to see the needs, to simply be present. I'm starting to see and believe that so much "good work" that is often done is often done too quickly. It is still good work, but it could be so much better if the idea and heart behind it were given time to "Be still."

Help Support Ballet Rwanda

2009-10-20T12:09:00.000-07:00

We are very proud of our friend, Caroline Peixoto, who moved with us to Rwanda. She is launching Ballet Rwanda on November 9. Check it out at www.balletrwanda.com and if you're interested in helping her meet her fundraising goal of $2000, you can give online at www.balletrwanda.com.

Dossier in the Hands of the Minister

2009-10-16T11:51:00.000-07:00

OK....now we wait...our dossier was delivered to the Minister of Gender and Family Promotion yesterday. Hard to believe we may have our son within a couple months.

Adoption update

2009-10-12T10:54:00.000-07:00

Our dossier arrived at our Rwandan attorney's office this evening. We will meet tomorrow and then she is presenting it to the Minister of Gender and Family Formation. According to this attorney, it is highly likely that we could receive our child within 2-3 months. The other thing she told us is that since we are in-country, once the Minister has approved our dossier, then our attorney will go with us to the Sisters of Charity Home of Hope orphanage and we will choose our child. Dano and I are taking big, deep breaths right now. This is so different from how our other two adoptions went. And it feels like a very heavy weight on us right now to "choose" our child. So we are praying in a very different way for our son right now and would appreciate any prayers from friends and family.

A little press from our friends in Rhode Island

2009-10-09T23:36:00.000-07:00

http://www.eastbayri.com/detail/131672.html?content_source=&category_id=&search_filter=rwanda&list_type=&order_by=&order_sort=&content_class=&sub_type=&town_id=

The reporter saw the chalk painting that our friend had commissioned of the girls at the Providence Street Festival and wanted to know the story behind it. Dano did the interview via Skype, so there are a few misspellings and omissions, but it was still nice to have the free press.

We also have a blog for Karisimbi at www.karisimbipartners.blogspot.com

Day to Day in Rwanda

2009-10-09T11:44:00.000-07:00

So we've been here nine days already. In January 2008, my college roommate, Anne Mugofwa, told me on a phone call that I would find myself in Africa much sooner than I expected. I told her we kept getting sidetracked by Asia. Who would have guessed?! Anne has never been to Rwanda, but the company she works for just decided to open an office here, so she was here on Wednesday and will be back in a few weeks. We managed to get breakfast together. I think it was rather surreal for both of us. When we were in college, we always dreamed of doing some great work together that would bridge our continents. Now we are on the same continent. I'm still in a season of listening, absorbing and learning, so am not jumping the gun on any work-related ventures (outside of helping us launch our company), but it is fun to wonder how Anne and I may do something together in the future.

I don't really have a routine yet. I've told myself next week is the week for that. I have my language lessons scheduled for almost every day next week so that I can catch up to Carter. Lian's school will be on a regular schedule and I'm committed to doing "school" stuff with Anna. Of course, if you know me, you know that is hard for me to do and not invite all the neighbor kids. So, Anna and I took "school" outside the gate today. Also, if you know me well, you will know what a stretch it is for me to live in a "gated" area, but that's how things are done here. Anna and I set up our blocks on the front yard and just started playing. We saw Pierre and JoJo and said, "Ngeeno Hano" (come and play) and they did. I spelled out their names for them, whcih was very fun for them. Most of all, they just liked building towers and crashing them down.

Setting up a house here is a lot different. Stuff at the department store is not cheap, so you go to the furniture market where you can either choose something off the block or bring ina picture of what you'd like and have them make it for you. Of course, that requires a lot of bargaining and negotiating and since I'm white with Chinese children, we are an oddity. But, I felt more confident today and I asked our house helper, Consolee, to help me with some of the negotiations. It took 45 minutes, and me walking to the store across the street, in order to get them to lower the price on a bathroom cabinet, but in the end it was a good deal on all fronts.

Lian had a great first week of school and seems to be doing well. We decided that we city folk need to embrace our new surroundings and our beautiful yard and welcome a few more additions to our family. So meet "Sunny and Joy" - these are our gifts to our girls for being such troopers this summer. We met this guy who was giving them away for free. And he has someone make the cage for us. The girls were so surprised! We saw them today and chose two boys (yes, boys, even though Anna named hers Joy) so as to prevent future bunnies from being born. We will go back next week to bring them home. Hmmmm...chickens might be next since we do have the chicken coop...

First Week's Reflections

2009-10-06T08:10:00.000-07:00

***Having a difficult time uploading pics here. If you are on Facebook, please check out my Facebook photos for most recent pics***

It is hard to believe we have been here six days. I actually feel like I have lived here for much longer than that. Now I don't think I could have said that the first two days, but now I am starting to feel at home. The past two days in particular have been wonderful.

Yesterday was Lian's first day at Kigali International Community School. She had a wonderful time and it was honestly nice to just have Anna home with me for a day. We were able to have one on one time, made an art project and just played together. Then we went for a walk in our neighborhood. I took a play parachute with me. We walked to the place where people seem to gather. There was one small boy there and a teenage girl. We showed them the parachute and I asked if they wanted to hold it. Then I began to sing Kinyarwandan numbers from 1-10 to the tune of "Ten Little Indians". Before I knew it there were about a dozen kids playing with us. We had so much fun.

Lian had asked me the other day why we couldn't give the kids the candy we had brought. I told her that I wanted the neighbor kids to see her and Anna as their friends first, rather than the girls who give them candy. She seemed to understand. After a few weeks, I'm sure we'll give them some treats, but for now it is neat to see them becoming friends with their neighbors and it felt good to tell the neighbors that we would be here for a few years. Thus, even though we had to go inside, we would be back.

After picking up Lian from school, I went to my first Kinyarwandan language lesson. Carter has been studying for a few weeks, but said I could join him for his lessons. I have much to catch up on, but the tutor was so encouraging. His name is Silas. I like that we are learning the building blocks of the language, rather than just expressions. There is much to learn, but I am so desparate to be able to communicate with the children here.

We had our first Rwandan meal last night since our house helper, Consolee, cooked for us.

What a treat. It is definitely a change for me to have someone helping with the cleaning, cooking and laundry, but somehow I don't think I'll be complaining about it. I am still cooking several nights a week ,but it is fun to have Rwandan meals a few nights as well. We are definitely much healthier here - we drink water all day long and sweets are expensive and not easy to find. Thus we're eating a lot of beans, rice, and fruit.

We got a car today as well. It is a sedan and is the color of eggplant. It has tinted windows and has this lovely "funky" sound when you go into reverse. It's gotten a few laughs, but it gets us where we need to go, is great on the bumps, and gets great gas mileage (gas is $6/gallon here). Kerry said it needed a name. Eggplant in french is aubergine (sp?), so we're calling it "Obie" for short : ) It feels great to be driving on my own. I got lost going to Lian's school today, but managed to find my way. There really aren't that many main roads in Kigali, so should be easy to navigate once I practice a bit. Even managed to find my way to the market and craft store today.

Kerry, Kristin and I went to a Bible study for women today. There are two women there who've adopted Rwandan babies, so another great community to connect with.

On the Karisimbi front, the guys have their first strategic planning retreat this weekend and it looks like three more definite clients are in the works. We have eight proposals out to other potential clients and things continue to move forward.

I just realized this posting isn't really my reflections, but more newsy. I"ll try to be more reflective in my next post because there is definitely a lot upon which to reflect here.

The First 48 Hours in Rwanda

2009-10-01T13:45:00.000-07:00

I'll try to post some pictures in the next day or two, but they are taking too long to upload tonight and I am quite tired. We have had a very full 48 hours here in Kigali and according to our friends here, we have accomplished a great deal in a short amount of time. Many thanks to the Crocketts who have been here for five weeks. Kerry has been my tour guide around Kigali and Carter had things like internet, water, electricity (have to pay in advance), and interviews with potential staff lined up for us the moment we arrived. I hear that is a minor miracle.

We were without water yesterday. The emergency tank was empty. Then the electricity goes off almost every day for an hour or more, so that is fun. But, we truly have so much to give thanks for. One hundred yards from our home is a common clustering of shanties and mud houses. The children from this area hang out on our street a lot. While waiting for our ride yesterday, the girls and I orchestrated a game of tag with the neighborhood kids. We had a blast and I hope to see Jackie, Nadesh, Daniel, and Christian again soon. I truly have nothing to complain about when the water tank is empty. Most of these families have to walk to a well to fill their jerry can with water.

I am truly understanding the need for our home to be our refuge. Maybe that sounds selfish, but there are so many needs all around and just doing life takes a lot out of you - and it's only been 48 hours! It is nice to return to our home and just feel safe and surrounded by a few things that make us feel at home. I am very grateful for the beautiful garden we have and I am determined to grow something successfully :) Lian is most excited to eat the mango, papayas and avocadoes growing from our trees.

Lian starts school on Monday and we are going to meet her teacher tomorrow. Anna will really miss having her big sister around, but we met a young woman on the plane who is Rwandan, but has lived in California for the past ten years. Olive has a three year old daughter, who was also on the plane. We hit it off and she asked if we could get together sometime. She wrote me today and Anna has her very first playdate next week. Hard to believe my three year old has lived on three continents in three years.

The guys are hard at work already with Karisimbi. They are hosting a strategic planning retreat with Gerard Sina of Sorwatum, a tomato processing company, in a week or two. And they continue to meet with potential clients. The need for these small to medium size companies in this country is great.

The End of our Great Journey...Beginning of Another

2009-09-27T20:09:00.001-07:00

At some point, I need to really reflect on all that took place this summer. We feel so blessed to have visited friends and family from so many different spheres of life. And most of the time, we felt unworthy of the love and prayers we received from those we love. It is hard to know how to say thank you to the many friends who opened their homes to us across the country. We only stayed in a hotel one night. Incredible gift. Just this week, after celebrating my brother's wedding, we traveled to Boston and stayed with our dear friends, Eric and Beth Mollenhauer. It is so refreshing to be with friends who've known you for close to 20 years. We then traveled to Rhode Island to stay with other dear friends, Kurt and Mary Jamiel, and to celebrate our friend Amy Macera's wedding with my annual reunion gang.

Kurt and Mary completely surprised us with an incredible gift. Kurt was a sponsor of the Providence Rotary Club Street Festival fundraiser. He wanted to show us the chalk art done by various artists. As we were walking on the path, we came to one entitled, "Love is Patient" and there was an incredible portrait of our girls. Kurt had hired a local artist friend to creat the beautiful picture you see here. Dano and I did not know what to say.

It seems we've been speechless most of this trip. We are blessed with incredible friends and family members who inspire us with their generosity, humility, good works, and faith. So thank you to everyone who made this "Great American Journey" possible. Now we set off for another tomorrow morning...one we know is already changing our lives forever.

Dossier off to State Dept and Rwandan Embassy

2009-09-16T16:21:00.001-07:00

Six weeks ago, we began the process to adopt a son from Rwanda. I cannot believe how fast the time has gone by. We are doing the process independently, so I was a bit nervous regarding the administrative challenges of getting this all done without any problems. However, here we are six weeks later and our dossier is complete and being reviewed by the State Department and will be delivered to the Rwandan Embassy tomorrow supposedly. Hoping and praying that we did not forget anything. I am still in shock by how fast we got this done. We are so thankful to be in Vermont for this process. In Seattle, it took me close to nine months before our dossier was ready to send to China.

Today, Anna said, "Thank you mommy for getting me a little brother. I SoOOOO excited!"

And Lian is already making her list of names for him.

We feel very blessed.

12 days left till we move to Rwanda...in that time we will attend my brother's wedding, drive to Boston, see some Revolutionary War sites, visit our good friends the Mollenhauers, drive to Warren, RI to stay with our dear friends, the Jamiels, and then attend Amy Macera's wedding, which will be my annual reunion with my college roommates, and then finally drive to NJ on the 27th to stay with the Peixotos, before their daughter, Caroline, joins us on the flight to Rwanda on the 28th. Whew....my emotions are starting to run a little high by this reality.

Rwanda Journey Adds Another to Our Family

2009-08-27T14:31:00.000-07:00

One more month until we depart for Rwanda. Hard to believe. This summer has been such a gift to our family. It has been amazing to see the girls grow in their love and friendship with each other. Over 6200 miles traveled across this beautiful country. Now we are in beautiful Vermont. For four weeks we don't have to unpack our bags. After living out of suitcases since we sold our house on May 31, this is very welcome. We are settled into my parents' lake cottage in the town of Glover, VT. It is literally in the middle of nowhere, but that is a welcome respite for us. For pictures of the cottage, check out www.villagevictorian.com and then click on the lake cottage link. We have to drive 10 miles to get internet access, so it's been nice to take a break from being "wired."

Our big news as a family is that we've decided to add another member to our family. Dano and I have thought about adding to our family for over a year, but while it was easy for us to decide on China for our girls, we just didn't know from where our third child would come. The wait for Chinese adoptions is now 3-5 years. Since we will be in Rwanda for at least three years, we decided to pursue a Rwandan adoption. While in Ft. Worth, TX, we met with Gladney Adoptions because we knew they worked in Rwanda. While everyone there was very nice, we were overwhelmed by the costs of a third adoption. We talked with another couple who adopted from Rwanda and they recommended we go independently. We then learned Rwanda prefers this method. We also learned from Gladney that if we wanted to adopt from Rwanda, we had better get our homestudy and dossier prepared prior to leaving the States. We had thought we'd start the process after moving to Rwanda. We gulped....how could we process everything in less than 6 weeks? Just to file our I-600A(petition to the US government to adopt an orphan) had always taken 3-5 months for our other two daughters. I truly believe God knew we needed to be in Vermont.

Vermont is very adoption-friendly and it is a small state. We have been working our tails off the past two weeks trying to get all of our paperwork needed for our dossier and we were able to get our homestudy done and written in three days, scheduled an appointment with immigration last week to file our I-600A. Eight days later, we have our approval in hand! I love this state! I also love small towns...(I know I have a blog somewhere in my mind about what I've pondered regarding the future of small towns in America)...we were able to get a doctor's appointmen tfor our physicals within a week. The local notary has processed everything for free for us...our friends from Seattle have been incredible getting letters of reference signed for us and our attorney friend Sherman Snow has been our "notary-in-residence" for all Seattle area documents. We feel incredibly blessed. All this to say....our paperwork is all ready for its next stage.

The next stage is to get our documents notarized by the secretary of state in each originating state, i.e. NY birth certificate for me notarized by Secy of State of NY, bank docs from Texas, notarized by Texas, etc. This is what the agencies used to do for us. Once we receive those documents back, which we hope will only take two weeks, we can then file our dossier with the US Secretary of State's office. Once that is received back (and we've found someone who can do this in person in DC), it is taken to the Rwandan Embassy in D.C. Once that is approved, we can hand it in to the Rwandan Minister of Gender and Family Information in Kigali. Our hope is we will have this in our hands when we leave for Kigali.

What is the timeline for receiving our son? Rwanda is new to international adoptions, so a lot could change, but it seems that once the dossier is received by the Minister, it may only take 2-4 months to receive our referral. This is hard for us to fathom after we waited 18 months for Lian and 2 1/2 years for Anna. So...stay tuned...

Our Africa Reading List

2009-08-12T17:53:00.000-07:00

The Following is our book list as we prepare to move to Rwanda next month. A few people had asked me for suggestions, so I hope this is helpful.

Read This Year
A Thousand Hills: Rwanda's Rebirth and the Man Who Dreamed It by Steven Kinzer
Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust by Immaculee Ilibagiza
Scared: A Novel on the Edge of the World by Tom Davis
We Wish to Inform You that Tomorrow We Will be Killed with Our Families: Stories from Rwanda by Philip Gourevitch
The Bishop of Rwanda by John Rucyahana and James Riordan

Currently Reading
The Mission Song by John Le Carre
Africa: Altered States, Ordinary Miracles by Richard Dowd
The State of Africa: A History of Fifty Years of Independence by Martin Meredith
The Covenant by James Michener

Still to Read
The Bottom Billion: Why the Poorest Countries are Failing and What Can be Done About It by Paul Collier
The Blue Sweater: Bridging the Gap Between Rich and Poor in an Interconnected World by Jacqueline Novogratz

Please let us know if you have any other suggestions for us.

Anna's quotes

2009-07-30T19:10:00.000-07:00

We have been driving all week, staying with friends and not having much internet access, so I am way behind on blogs. However, before I forget these Anna-isms, I thought I'd just write down two of them:

"Where are we?"
"Mississippi"
"Did Mrs. Sippie eat my fruit rollup?"

"Keep your eyes open girls for a restaurant."
"No, Daddy. I will keep my eyes closed for a restaurant."

We must start from the simple premise that Africa’s future is up to Africans

2009-07-13T18:01:00.000-07:00

Our partner, Carter Crockett, just moved to Kigali on the 12th. On the 11th, President Obama went to Africa to give a message of economic hope and partnership. I've highlighted some portions of his speech below, one that is the latest indication that we are in the "right place... right time". The whole article can be read at:http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2009/07/11/obamas-speech-in-ghana-on-african-development/

“We must start from the simple premise that Africa’s future is up to Africans.”

and the West has often approached Africa as a patron, rather than a partner.

This progress may lack the drama of the 20th century’s liberation struggles, but make no mistake: it will ultimately be more significant. For just as it is important to emerge from the control of another nation, it is even more important to build one’s own.

So I believe that this moment is just as promising for Ghana — and for Africa — as the moment when my father came of age and new nations were being born. This is a new moment of promise. Only this time, we have learned that it will not be giants like Nkrumah and Kenyatta who will determine Africa’s future. Instead, it will be you — the men and women in Ghana’s Parliament, and the people you represent. Above all, it will be the young people — brimming with talent and energy and hope — who can claim the future that so many in my father’s generation never found.

To realize that promise, we must first recognize a fundamental truth that you have given life to in Ghana: development depends upon good governance.

As for America and the West, our commitment must be measured by more than just the dollars we spend. I have pledged substantial increases in our foreign assistance, which is in Africa’s interest and America’s. But the true sign of success is not whether we are a source of aid that helps people scrape by — it is whether we are partners in building the capacity for transformational change.

This mutual responsibility must be the foundation of our partnership.

The continent is rich in natural resources. And from cell phone entrepreneurs to small farmers, Africans have shown the capacity and commitment to create their own opportunities. But old habits must also be broken. Dependence on commodities — or on a single export — concentrates wealth in the hands of the few and leaves people too vulnerable to downturns.

In Ghana, for instance, oil brings great opportunities, and you have been responsible in preparing for new revenue. But as so many Ghanaians know, oil cannot simply become the new cocoa. From South Korea to Singapore, history shows that countries thrive when they invest in their people and infrastructure; when they promote multiple export industries, develop a skilled work force and create space for small and medium-sized businesses that create jobs.

As Africans reach for this promise, America will be more responsible in extending our hand. By cutting costs that go to Western consultants and administration, we will put more resources in the hands of those who need it, while training people to do more for themselves. That is why our $3.5 billion food security initiative is focused on new methods and technologies for farmers — not simply sending American producers or goods to Africa. Aid is not an end in itself. The purpose of foreign assistance must be creating the conditions where it is no longer needed.

America can also do more to promote trade and investment. Wealthy nations must open our doors to goods and services from Africa in a meaningful way. And where there is good governance, we can broaden prosperity through public-private partnerships that invest in better roads and electricity; capacity-building that trains people to grow a business; and financial services that reach poor and rural areas. This is also in our own interest — for if people are lifted out of poverty and wealth is created in Africa, new markets will open for our own goods.

One area that holds out both undeniable peril and extraordinary promise is energy. Africa gives off less greenhouse gas than any other part of the world, but it is the most threatened by climate change. A warming planet will spread disease, shrink water resources and deplete crops, creating conditions that produce more famine and conflict. All of us — particularly the developed world — have a responsibility to slow these trends — through mitigation, and by changing the way that we use energy. But we can also work with Africans to turn this crisis into opportunity.

Together, we can partner on behalf of our planet and prosperity and help countries increase access to power while skipping the dirtier phase of development. Across Africa, there is bountiful wind and solar power; geothermal energy and bio-fuels. From the Rift Valley to the North African deserts; from the Western coast to South Africa’s crops — Africa’s boundless natural gifts can generate its own power, while exporting profitable, clean energy abroad.

These steps are about more than growth numbers on a balance sheet. They’re about whether a young person with an education can get a job that supports a family; a farmer can transfer their goods to the market; or an entrepreneur with a good idea can start a business. It’s about the dignity of work. Its about the opportunity that must exist for Africans in the 21st century.

America has a responsibility to advance this vision, not just with words, but with support that strengthens African capacity.

With strong institutions and a strong will, I know that Africans can live their dreams in Nairobi and Lagos; in Kigali and Kinshasa; in Harare and right here in Accra.

Now, that triumph must be won once more, and it must be won by you. Fifty-two years ago, the eyes of the world were on Ghana. And a young preacher named Martin Luther King traveled here, to Accra, to watch the Union Jack come down and the Ghanaian flag go up. This was before the march on Washington or the success of the civil rights movement in my country. Dr. King was asked how he felt while watching the birth of a nation. And he said: “It renews my conviction in the ultimate triumph of justice.”

And I am particularly speaking to the young people. In places like Ghana, you make up over half of the population. Here is what you must know: the world will be what you make of it.

You have the power to hold your leaders accountable and to build institutions that serve the people. You can serve in your communities and harness your energy and education to create new wealth and build new connections to the world. You can conquer disease, end conflicts and make change from the bottom up. You can do that. Yes you can. Because in this moment, history is on the move. 

But these things can only be done if you take responsibility for your future. It won’t be easy. It will take time and effort. There will be suffering and setbacks. But I can promise you this: America will be with you. As a partner. As a friend. Opportunity won’t come from any other place, though _ it must come from the decisions that you make, the things that you do, and the hope that you hold in your hearts.

Freedom is your inheritance. Now, it is your responsibility to build upon freedom’s foundation.”

Differences between our two girls

2009-07-06T17:54:00.000-07:00

Traveling with our girls also highlights their differences - and oh how we love both of them! Tonight, we were driving home from Lian's camp in Fort Worth. We had just had some dinner. Definitely nearing bed time. Anna would not stop talking. Our entire road trip was like this - constant Anna chatter. We finally resorted to our "Quiet Game." You know, the one where you see who can be the most quiet. At the mention of this game, this is how the following ensued:

Daddy - "It's time for the Quiet Game."
Lian - "I LOVE that game!" (proceeds to be silent for the next ten minutes)
Anna - "No."
Anna - "Let's play game."
Anna - "What game, Daddy?"
Daddy - "The quiet game, Anna."
Anna - "Oh. What's that?"
Anna - "We play game."
Anna - "Mom, you be Bob. I be Cucumber (referring to Bob and Larry from Veggie Tales)"
Anna - "What, ma?" (I hadn't said anything)
Anna - "Momma - you be Bob. I be cucumber. Mom?"
Mommy - "Look, Anna, we are almost home. I can't be Bob."
Anna - "Home to Texas house?"
Mommy - "Yes, Anna."
Anna - "We aren't. You be Bob. I be cucumber."

and then we pulled in the driveway. So much for the quiet game :)

Advice for traveling long-distances with small children

2009-07-06T08:27:00.000-07:00

My friend asked if I could write about advice for traveling with small children. We often say that our children were conditioned to travel long distances from the moment they arrived into our family since we had to fly home from China with them. Lian has traveled back to China with us when we went to receive her sister and both girls traveled to East Africa with us last Fall. They have made several domestic flights to see family and for work with me, but this was the longest stretch they've had in a car. We didn't know what to expect. Everyone said, "I hope you have lots of DVDs." We actually didn't pack any intentionally. Of course, we weren't sure if we'd have to buy one mid-trip to save our sanity, but thus far we haven't needed one. but overall it wasn't nearly as bad as we thought it might be. We have two completely different personalities in our children - Lian is quite content to play by herself quietly in the car, but when she's tired and hungry she can get grumpy. Anna is a constant chatterbug and hates to be confined, so we weren't sure what to expect. To be honest - at the end of five days of traveling in the car, Dano and I were ready to have a little space :) So here's a few pointers we have learned on this road trip and our other travels...

Children will rise to the occasion. If they hear you talking pre-trip about how tough the road trip is going to be in front of them, they will probably think it's going to be difficult. So make the preparations fun. Be excited about it in front of them. Don't complain in front of them.

Emphasize Team-work. We always start out any trip with a little family cheer. May sound corny, but I think it reemphasizes the fact that we are a team. If one of us is grumpy, it affects the rest of us. We are a team and we have to work together to make our trip a success. That means everyone has to help. S

The Power of Music and Podcasts. Prior to moving all our earthly possessions, Dano downloaded all of our music onto his IPod, so we wouldn't have to bring any CDs to Rwanda. According to Anna, classical music is her favorite. Anna is a non-stop talker. When she's not talking, she is singing to herself. This has driven us a little crazy on this trip, but we found that classical music helps calm her. We've also downloaded our own podcasts, not just kids music - i.e. BBC, 60 Minutes, Tim Keller sermons, along with enough 80's music to keep us going - stuff that makes us feel like adults. We tell the kids this is our tiem to listen to the radio and we expect them to respect that. Again, have high expectations - they will rise to it.

Two Hour Jumping Jack Stops and Find the Mc-Ds with a Playground. The kids need to run around and so do the adults. We tried stopping every 2 to 2 1/2 hours and we all did jumping jacks together outside the car. Pretty funny looking, but you'll never see the people at the gas station again :) The playgrounds at Mc-Ds were definite life-savers. We never spent more than 30 minutes at a rest-stop and never sat down at a restaurant. Always took our food with us - as that kept the girls busy in the car.

Fun, but relatively healthy snacks. The girls love the fruit roll-ups we brought and they take a long time to eat, so they're great! String cheese kept in the cooler is also great. We also got each girl a little bag of candy and when they're extra good, we give them a couple jellybeans or whatever is in their stash. And definitely give the incentive of at least one DQ stop. It's an incentive for the parents as well :)

Lian's Advice - Lian has her own blog for her friends called www.lianmeistravels.blogspot.com. If you want to check it out, send her an email at lian.mei.smiles@gmail.com, as it is a private blog. She wrote down some of her advice last night, which we'll try to post soon. Some of the advice was to bring lots of books and stickers and eat lots of snacks. I probably packed too many books. Would definitely go lighter on that load.

OK - those are some quick thoughts for the morning. Let me know if you have any questions.

We Made it to Texas!!!!

2009-07-06T08:09:00.000-07:00

All I have to say is my children are amazing. We moved out of our home on May 31. We then lived with our dear friends, Brook and Susan Selby, for three weeks. Then we moved to Dano's mom's house for a week. On June 29 we took Lian to her ballet dress rehearsal. As you can see from this picture, she looks so beautiful! We were so proud of her. The next morning, we packed up the car, went to the travel clinic for our last shots for Africa, and then started driving towards Bend, OR to say goodbye to my bestest friend, Suzanne. We took the girls to the bouncy house in Bend and to swim in the Deschutes River. What a great way to start our trip across the country.

It was six hours to Bend, six to Boise, ID, where we stayed with Laura and Peter Barton before leaving at 7 am on July 3. We thought it was a 12 hour drive to Colorado Springs. I was a little mistaken - 17 hours later we arrived to Matt and Melody Monberg's home - at midnight. And we only stopped twice for 30 minutes each. The girls were incredible.

On July 4, we drove 7 hours to Amarillo, TX, where we had the chance to stay with some friends of my parents - the Ramirezes. We watched the fireworks in the heart of Texas. Felt very patriotic. On July 5, we drove the last six hours to Ft. Worth. A friend in Dallas told us about some missionary housing that the Southern Baptists have. We cold-called Cross Timber church in Burleson, TX and they are graciously letting us stay in their guest house even though we aren't technically "missionaries." We cannot believe their generosity - it is a 3 bedroom rambler, super comfortable, with a huge yard. The girls are so excited to have their own room and Lian quickly set up and organized their room. As much as we are so grateful for the generosity and hospitality of our friends, it felt so nice to set up home (even though it's only two weeks) as just our family.

We took Lian to the Hope Connection camp this morning at Texas Christian University. This is a camp run by Dr. Karyn Purvis (author of The Connected Child) and is for adopted children who have some emotional needs (attachment/sensory) due to being in institutional care when they were babies. There are only ten 5-8 year olds. It is a normal fun day camp, but everything that is done is done in a way to help the children heal neurologically and emotionally. We immediately fell in love with Dr. Purvis upon arriving. We are the only non-Texas family and are grateful they made an exception for us. Lian was immediately put at ease and is so excited for the water-balloon fights, swimming, and arts they have promised. She has a buddy named Sarah, who is a senior Psych major at TCU. We left her this morning so grateful for this opportunity.

So...our time in Ft. Worth has begun. We do not have internet at the house, so our time on the internet may be a little intermittent. Thanks for everyone's prayers for our safe travel.

It is not finished...it is beginning...

2009-06-05T11:43:00.001-07:00

We sold our house and moved out of our home last weekend. I called my mom and said, "It is finished." In her wise way, she said, "No, it is beginning." I like the way she said that. "It is beginning." This move to Rwanda certainly feels like a new beginning in so many ways. It also feels like the culmination of all we have done over the past twelve years. It just feels right.

I'll try to post some photos of the move in a few days. Needless to say, life is going full-throttle right now. We have some form of a goodbye dinner with someone almost every evening for the next two weeks. Here is our plan:

June 1-19 - Live with our friends, the Selbys, while Lian finishes kindergarten
June 20 - Jen speaks at Pacific Northwest Conference about Children's Hope Chest /attend farewell for Dano's brother and sister-in-law, who also happen to be moving overseas for a year (to Brazil)
June 21-30 - Live with Dano's mom
July 1 - Lian's ballet recital and then we all get into the car and start driving across the country
July 6-17 - Arrive to Ft. Worth Texas for Lian to attend the Hope Connection camp - a camp geared towards helping families with adopted children.
July 17-Aug 5 - Travel Eastward, stopping to see friends and familyi along the way.
Aug 5 - Sep 19 - In Vermont for some much needed rest and to get ready for my brother's wedding on Sep 19
Sep 26 - attend another good friend's wedding in Mass.
Sep 29 - Fly out for Rwanda

Carter Crockett, our partner, moves to Rwanda July 14. His family joins him Aug 21. Dano may have to fly to Rwanda once during the summer. We are still waiting word on that.

I'll try to do a better job at posting, but hope you'll forgive our lack of communication for a few weeks. In the meantime, do check out our website - www.karisimbipartners.com. You can join our mailing list by clicking on "connect."

You are Invited to a Launch Party and Concert on May 17

2009-04-21T22:23:00.001-07:00

For tickets go to: http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/64185

Divine Makeover

2009-04-20T20:07:00.001-07:00

We have been members of 100 year old Rainier Avenue Church for 8 years and for the majority of that time our church has been planning to renovate and remodel with a view towards the next 100 years. Dano is the project manager for our church's Divine Makeover. It is an honor for us to end our time in Seattle by working alongside so many who are working so that generations of families to come will be served in our community. It was quite an honor for the Seattle Times to feature this weekend's "barn raising" on the cover of their local news section today.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2009086082_churchbuild20m.html?syndication=rss

Next Steps Toward Moving to Rwanda

2009-04-14T15:42:00.000-07:00

2009Rwanda Trip

Dano, Carter and Kerry returned home a week ago after an incredible 12 day trip in Rwanda. The trip only affirmed the direction we are headed towards with Muhabura Venture Partners (we changed the name - that was one of the practical things that came out of the trip). They had over 40 meetings with Rwandan entrepeneurs, successful African businessmen and women, directors of various equity funds and associations, and governmet officials. The bottom line is that we cannot get there fast enough - the work is there, what we are proposing doesn't really exist yet, and our combination of gifts and experience would be invaluable. Carter and Dano have been asked to submit two proposals this week that could determine when exactly we will move, but right now it looks like Carter will be moving July 15, Kerry and the kids will arrive a month later, followed by the Jukanovich family after my brother's wedding in late September. Dano will probably need to make another trip or two before we move depending on how our proposals are received.

Many of our friends have asked what an incbator is. We hope our new name will describe our purpose more clearly. Muhabura means
"the guide" in Kinyarwanda. A venture firm invests in companies. We are investing our time and talent and potential financial investments into high-impact Rwandan ventures. We believe that in helping companies grow and succeed, that more people will be lifted out of poverty through the creation of capital and employment. We want to help people's dreams come true. Partners - many firms invest financial resources into foreign companies, but few get down in the trenches with the leaders of these companies on a day to day basis, helping them think strategically about where their company is heading and navigating the day to day challenges of a small business. We are committing the next 3-5 years to do so.

We are creating a business, but we are also asking friends and family to help us get to Rwanda. With airfare, 6 months rent (you have to put down in order to get a modest place), and shipping costs, we need $25K per family. Bridge2Rwanda has offered to accept these donations on our behalf - http://www.bridge2rwanda.org/donate/ just enter our names in the "other" section.

We are revising our prospectus this week. If you're interested in receiving a copy, please email me at jennifer@jukanovich.com.

Dano is off to Rwanda tonight!

2009-03-26T16:50:00.000-07:00

Dano and the Crocketts leave for a 12 day trip to Rwanda tonight. We've started a "cause" on Facebook called the Jukanoviches and Crocketts in Rwanda. We explain about the incubator we plan to launch in this cause. We hope you'll consider joining our cause.

http://apps.facebook.com/causes/255545/16087822?m=cc366e79

The girls and I are holding down the homefront and will spend four days in Bend, OR visiting my best friend, Suzanne Baker. Twelve days is a long time without their dad, but we are thankful for modern technology that will hopefully let us see each other via video a few times during his trip. This is an exploratory trip to meet with Rwandan entrepeneurs, business folks, government leaders, potential investors and others who've heard about our incubator and want to help us get to Rwanda to launch it. Kerry will be spending a lot of time exploring life in Rwanda - visiting the school, looking at potential houses, hanging out in the markets, etc. They have the 12 days packed with meetings. Please pray for safety and health and a very fruitful time.

Help us get to Rwanda!

2009-03-20T10:59:00.000-07:00

Bridge2Rwanda has offered to accept donations on our behalf to get us to Rwanda. Once we are in Rwanda, we will be setting up a for-profit organization and we are meeting with private equity funds to get this established. However, there are immediate moving costs for two families to move to Rwanda by this summer or early Fall. Thank you for considering this.

https://secure.bridge2rwanda.org/donate/

Just indicate these gifts are for the Jukanovich/Crockett business incubator. Thank you.

Fast Company Article on Rwanda

2009-03-20T10:33:00.001-07:00

If you have a minute, read this article in Fast Company on the development of Rwanda. Several of the people mentioned are folks we are engaging with (Dan Cooper, Joe Ritchie, Dale Dawson, Francis Gatare). Also, we have received incredible counsel from some folks this week and have decided to take their counsel to become a for-profit. We will still be seeking initial seed capital from friends and family to get there, just like initial venture capital because it will take a while to get the actually corporation formed, but this attorney is going to help us with that for free. Incredible.

I also went to a lecture last night by Richard Dowden, president of the Royal African Society/former Africa editor for The Economist - http://www.amazon.co.uk/Africa-Altered-States-Ordinary-Miracles/dp/184627154

Caroline Peixoto went with me (Caroline is moving to Rwanda with us. I knew her mother when I was six years old. Now her 21 year old daughter is moving with us - crazy). It was like he was speaking right to us. He completely affirmed the direction we are moving in and provided invaluable insights. I was able to talk with him and in his words what we are setting out to do is “Brilliant.” Just a little encouraging. There also happened to be four Rwandans there who are interning at RealNetworks for three months. I talked with them for a while and will have them over for dinner. Just a really encouraging evening.

http://www.fastcompany.com/magazine/134/special-report-rwanda-rising.html?page=0%2C0

Dano leaves for Rwanda with the Crocketts next Thursday night on the redeye. They’ll be gone for 12 days. We'll post updates from that trip.

A Beautiful Adoption Story

2009-02-27T13:53:00.001-08:00

If you have time to watch this story, I would encourage you to do so.

http://tomdavis.typepad.com/tom_daviss_blog/2009/02/a-beautiful-adoption-story.html

Life is never dull - we ARE moving to Rwanda

2009-02-19T21:10:00.001-08:00

Yes, you heard me right. We are back on for the move to Rwanda, but this process has been much healthier than the previous. We are partnering together with Bridge2Rwanda (www.bridge2rwanda.org) to establish excellent, effective and sustainable incubation services for high-impact ventures. If you want to see our prospectus, feel free to email me at jennifer@jukanovich.com. We do have to raise the initial capital of $400K to start this venture so that our two families can move to Rwanda by the end of this summer for a minimum of two years and launch the work. Bridge2Rwanda is assisting us with this, and we are also partnering with Breakthrough Partners (www.breakthroughpartners.org), but if you'd like to invest, we'd love to talk with you. This is not a whim. This is the next thing we are doing in our life and we are not going to put an end date on it. We have received incredible affirmation and invitation by local Rwandans. Here's a bit more history if you'd like to know more...

It all started when our dear friends, Carter and Kerry Crockett, invited us to spend a weekend with them soon after the offer from Food for the Hungry was withdrawn.

We have been kindred spirits and dear friends with the Crocketts since we were first introduced to each other in Seattle’s inner city. Although we have lived in separate cities and countries for the past six years, this friendship has proven to be one of those rare gifts in life, the type that has connected, challenged and inspired each couple despite the distance and time apart. Carter had recently resigned from his professorship at Westmont College (he has been a business CEO/marketing exec and has his Ph.D. in entrepeneurial ethics). It seemed innocent enough to spend a weekend together considering God’s will for each family… but what emerged on that retreat was a common dream none of us suspected; a dream that has captured our imagination and interest in seeing what we could do together to join the work God is already doing in Africa.

Our families intend to move together, as families, to Rwanda to help alleviate poverty, build communities and share the love of Christ by nurturing new and existing business enterprises. We believe that there are two trends that favor such a vision. First, there is a significant demand in Africa today for enterprising individuals and innovative companies with the potential to build self-sustaining communities (and prevent undue reliance on aid or philanthropy). Secondly, there is a growing trend to use “business incubators” to facilitate and nurture practical aspects of this development in developing countries. Business incubation is seen as a potential next stage in poverty alleviation (beyond micro-finance), offering more than banking services, but the facilities, training and coaching required to aid in the creation of thriving enterprises. We are hoping that our experience as students and practitioners of business may equip us to provide the type of services typically encapsulated in the business incubator model.

Dano, Carter and Kerry will be traveling with Bridge2Rwanda at the end of March to begin the on-the-ground research needed for the business plan. We'll keep you posted.

New Video from Trip to Uganda

2009-01-08T21:29:00.001-08:00

Bobby Arnold is a 17 year old from Orlando who was part of the team that traveled to Uganda with us to see how Children's Hope Chest could come alongside others who are caring for the orphans there. Its an incredible video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwdSxzdXR88

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltQn87SDAeQ&feature=channel_page

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6n8rkEr5rwI&feature=channel

The Roller Coaster - We are no longer moving to Rwanda

2008-12-05T20:49:00.000-08:00

So....life can surely change in an instant...two months ago, we were enjoying life in Seattle, not thinking of moving at all. One month ago, we were visiting orphans and widows in Uganda and spending time with good friends in Kenya. In the midst of that trip, Dano was asked to consider a job with Food for the Hungry in Rwanda. We flew there, fell in love with the country, and decided to take the offer and life changed overnight. We cannot go into the details, but basically some significant red flags were raised in the eleventh hour and we are no longer moving to Rwanda. This was actually decided two weeks ago, but our hearts were so crushed with disappointment that we've only recently come out of our "funk."

We had started making plans to move, booked flights to see family to say goodbye and told all of our friends and loved ones we were moving to Rwanda for three years. We've spent the past month reading everything we could find on the history of the country. If you are aware that it will be a tough read, I highly, highly recommend the book, "We Wish to Inform You that Tomorrow We Will Be Killed With Our Families: Stories from Rwanda." It will really make you understand the current crisis in eastern Congo. We had already made some friends in Rwanda and received so much personal affirmation from friends and acquaintances.

So, now we're not moving. We do not know what is in store. We had never asked or planned for this opportunity, so in many ways life can just continue as normal, but something has changed in us. We've kept some connections open and if we are to move to the continent of Africa, we would be ready. Dano has also received some interesting offers here in Seattle, so we'll see. And if we are to stay in Seattle, then we will do so whole-heartedly.

Our church is considering sponsoring several orphan-led households that we met in Uganda. So to know that our church family could be a family to these 27 children makes the entire trip worth it. Whenever you travel somewhere and meet people from diverse cultures, your heart is never the same. We may not be moving to Rwanda, but our hearts have been touched and we are not the same.

Lian asks for your help

2008-11-18T14:08:00.000-08:00

When I came home today, my daughter showed me three drawings she had made. She said she wanted to help the kids in Africa. Lian wanted us to stand outside and ask people for 5 cents, 6 cents, 10 cents or 25 cents so that we could help the kids we met on our trip. She said she wants the money to be used for the kids for food or toys. So, I told her that instead of standing outside we could post her drawings on our website and ask people to consider giving. If people are interested in giving, please click on the donor badge to the left that provides money to Children's Hope Chest. The money goes directly to the kids. Thank you.

We are moving to Rwanda.

2008-11-10T19:57:00.000-08:00

Yes, that was not a typo. It is a long story of which we will share more over the coming months and it has all happened really fast (in five weeks). The short story is that Dano was offered a position as VP for Finance and Administration with Food for the Hungry/ProCom in Rwanda. He will be providing oversight to a water distribution business that received a contract from the Rwandan government and will provide water to 144,000 people. He will also be administrating and creating new business enterprises for Rwandans. This is why we took a detour to Rwanda for 18 hours on our recent trip to Africa. We need to be in Rwanda by January 30. We have made a three year commitment and will live in Kigali, Rwanda.

While we feel overwhelmed and in shock ourselves that this is happening, we also feel a tremendous sense of affirmation and peace that this is right for our family at this time. We'll write more soon.

Only in America

2008-11-07T16:26:00.000-08:00

Eric Metaxas sent me this from his friend in Rwanda. No matter who you voted for in this election, this just reaffirms the beauty and uniqueness of our democracy and the honor with which our leaders put aside their differences for the sake of our country.

http://www.ericmetaxas.com/uncategorized/rwandan-reaction-to-us-election-only-in-america/

My Husband's Blog

2008-11-05T19:46:00.000-08:00

Dano and I were able to visit some business, NGO and government folks while on a short visit to Rwanda during our Africa trip. He wrote some thoughts on economic development that myself and some friends thought others might find compelling. People always tell him he should write some of his thoughts down because he is a deep thinker who is able to ask the tough questions people usually don't want to ask. And he does something with his questions - he desires to do the good and to pursue truth. www.danojukanovich.blogspot.com.

Fun in the Sun

2008-10-26T20:14:00.000-07:00

Lian with Wema and Amani at the Indian Ocean- best friends forever after this past week.
Yes, we rode a camel on the beach.
And we got to see a lion basking in the sun.

A few more

2008-10-26T20:12:00.000-07:00

Amani (Ann's son) and Anna
Ann and Jen
Dano, Dave (Ann's husband) and the kids
Our breakfast buddy (he was literally right outside the breakfast window)

Photos

2008-10-26T20:09:00.000-07:00

While we were never able to get a charger for my camera, we were able to use Dave and Ann's camera. Mine was definitely clearer, so we were very disappointed to miss some key moments in our trip due to the lack of clarity, but at least we have enough pictures by which to remember this trip.

Here are just a few - the rest can be found on Picasa. Just click on the slideshow on the sidebar to the left and it will take you to our album

Scriptures We've Reflected Upon

2008-10-26T19:41:00.000-07:00

I tried to read a Proverb each day of our trip (i.e. Proverb 16 for the 16th of the month, 22 for the 22nd of the month, etc.) On the 22nd and 23rd we were discussing many of the things we had seen and I remembered I had not opened the Scripture yet. Here are a few of the scripture that jumped out at us:

Proverbs 22
2 Rich and poor have this in common:
The LORD is the Maker of them all.

16 He who oppresses the poor to increase his wealth
and he who gives gifts to the rich—both come to poverty.

22 Do not exploit the poor because they are poor
and do not crush the needy in court,

23 for the LORD will take up their case
and will plunder those who plunder them.

Proverbs 23

10 Do not move an ancient boundary stone
or encroach on the fields of the fatherless,

11 for their Defender is strong;
he will take up their case against you.

We Made it Home Safely

2008-10-26T19:28:00.000-07:00

After traveling for 28 hours straight with no down time in the airports for the girls to run around, we made it safely to Seattle. There is nothing like coming home. Our girls are really great travelers, but 28 hours was definitely their (and ours) limit.

We've been without internet access for several days, but we had such a great time in Kenya with Ann and her family. To go from seeing the poorest of the poor to being treated like royalty by our friends was quite an adjustment, but we are grateful for Ann and Dave's incredible hospitality. Mombasa is a beautiful city, set right on the Indian Ocean. We swam, Dano went scuba diving, Lian and I rode a camel on the beach, and we had three evenings of great one on one time with Ann and Dave where we discussed everything from U.S. politics (everyone we met wants Obama to win), foreign policy, economic development, Kingdom business, miracles, parenthood and marriage. We learned so much from these two...and our kids had a blast playing together.

We returned to Nairobi for only one day in which Ann drove us around the entire city, took us to the Masai market, had lunch with her sister, whose husband is the U.N.'s Director for Communicable Diseases in Africa, visited Good Shepherd church, where our friends, the Nsimbis, grew up, had tea with Ann's entire family, and then took off for our return flight home.

Our farewell tea with Ann's family was truly touching. Her father prayed for us as we went and we just felt we were in the presence of a holy man and woman (her mother). In their retirement, these two devote themselves to preaching around the country in open-air crusades and healing those who are ill. Ann's mother had a miraculous healing 20 years ago and since then God has used her to bring healing to hundreds of people. She said that she believes Africans see miracles because of their commitment to fasting before God. We felt so loved by her family and do hope we will see them again soon. Ann also had a good friend of her's come to the tea because she wanted us to meet. Dollee just left her job working for a granting organization that takes international funds directed for Africa and disperses them to various NGOs. She believes the Lord is calling her to start a foundation that provides money from African-led businesses to serve Africans. She really desires to see Africans move away from dependency on the West so they can take care of their own people. We heard this message often in our travels.

Other blogs about our trip to Africa

2008-10-26T19:26:00.000-07:00

Here are three other blogs that went into greater detail about the places we visited, as well as some of the places the rest of the team saw before we arrived.

Pastor Jon - http://pastorjondunwell.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2008-10-17T19%3A08%3A00-04%3A00&max-results=7

Brandi - homehopeandfuture.blogspot.com/

Daniel - www.danieljclark.com

The Other Side of Africa

2008-10-19T13:40:00.000-07:00

We arrived to the welcome embrace of my college friend, Ann Mugofwa. If she is indicative of African hospitality, we have a lot to learn. We feel like royalty. While we were really looking forward to sleeping in the same bed for a few nights for a change, Ann informed us that we needed to be up at 6 am in order to catch a flight to Mombasa. We had no idea what a treat we were in for…

Ann, her husband, Dave, and their two children, Amani (5 1/2) and Wema (8) traveled with us to Mombasa and then a three hour drive through the Kenyan savannah, finally reaching the Sarova Salt Lick Game Reserve. We had a two night stay at this Game Reserve that is out of this world. Unfortunately, probably one of the worst things that I could have done on a trip like this happened – I left my camera’s battery charger plugged into my wall at home. And guess what – no one in Kenya seems to use Canon cameras! I asked everyone at the lodge and we had also gone to a store and no one carried a Canon. Ann’s camera had also run out of batteries and since we were really out in the bush, it was not easy to obtain a new set. So…we had to rely on Lian’s kid camera for our first game drive, which is really unfortunate because we saw a male lion, which was incredible. Fortunately, Ann got her camera fixed so we have a few from the second day. Again, the internet reception is so bad where we are right now that it takes 10 minutes just to open one email, so I will post my pictures upon our return.

I’ll try to give you a quick glimpse – if you can imagine opening your bedroom window and seeing a troop of elephants walking royally towards the water hole that is underneath the windows of the dining hall. Once the elephants leave, the water buffalo arrive…and I’m not talking one or two…I’m talking of dozens of elephants, hundreds of water buffalo, then scores of zebras, a few wart hogs running through, and then when all is quiet out come the baboons (or as Anna says – the “baba boons”) carrying their children on their chests. It is absolutely surreal.

The juxtaposition of this portion of our trip in comparison to where we were just a few short days ago is almost shocking to the system. We drive for three hours past mud huts and tin roofed-houses, passing people carrying water jugs on their head, only to end up 30 minutes from any humans at a game reserve that feels like it is out of a storybook – and it has plenty of running water. There is something wrong with this picture. Don’t get me wrong – we definitely enjoyed our time, it was truly unreal and we are relaxing after an intense week – but the stark contrast just reminds me that there are solutions that are already out there. We can get water to people who are thirsty; we can feed those who are hungry; we can care for the orphan and the widow; it just takes a lot of resolve and the right people to make things happen.

That’s what has been so refreshing about being with Ann and Dave. They are people who are making things happen. They are successful young professionals and parents who care deeply about their country - and not just for this generation. They care about what will be for their children’s children. It is so uplifting to hear what they are learning about putting kingdom principles into action. They see changes happening in their government that are honoring human dignity. They realize it takes time, but they are not waiting around for the government to make things happen. They are doing it themselves. It has been so wonderful to be with them and to have our children playing together non-stop.

Following the game reserve, Ann and Dave surprised us again by treating our two families to a three night stay at a resort in Mombasa, right on the Indian Ocean. It is absolutely beautiful and feels so good to rest and be refreshed. I do believe that in the midst of seeing much pain, you still have to take time to enjoy God’s goodness and refresh your soul.

The hearts of our children

2008-10-15T11:27:00.000-07:00

***I've been trying to load pictures, but it took 50 minutes to load the last two and I can't stay up another hour. We'll post them on Picas after we get back.***

After we left the orphan-led household, we all got on the bus in silence. I turned around to ask how Lian was doing and she had her journal out. We hadn't written anything in it except for some fun facts about animals since we'd arrived. She had pulled it out on her own and written the words "Poor Kids." She drew six children who were crying. Dano asked, "Why are they crying?" She said, "Because they're poor. They have no mommy and daddy." They were poor because they had no mommy and daddy - not because they didn't have money, but because they didn't have a mom and dad. I turned towards the window with tears streaming down my face - I thanked the Lord for my daughter's heart and for her perception.

Today we were at Caring Hands ministry that provides work for widows. There was a woman there who has four children with AIDS. The youngest was about 6 months old and was with her. Not even realizing the impact of what she was doing, Anna went up to the baby and said, "Hug? Hug?" Finally they hugged each other. It was a beautiful and yet tragic moment all in one breath.

99.9% of orphans are never adopted. It seems unfair when I sit there holding our precious girls and I'm surrounded by boys and girls who would give anything to have a family love them. Tonight, a woman who works in the front office of the hotel asked me if I would adopt one of her nephes and nieces. THeir mom is dying of AIDS. I was in shock; yet also not. THis woman loves her nephews and nieces and she loves her sister. TO her it makes complete sense. I have adopted two already and I am a Christian, which, in her words as a Muslim, makes me have a good heart. I tried to explain it's not as easy as that. But, now I have a place I can direct her to to receive the help she needs.

In teh midst of all the tragedy, we decided that our family needed to have a down afternoon and we took the girls swimming. It was such a blast.

We leave for Kenya tomorrow morning, bright and early. We cannot wait.

2008-10-15T09:55:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here in my room at the Hotel Africana with African dance music playing in the background, my children asleep in their mosquito netting, yet feeling so far from the pain we experienced over the past three days. We were able to Skype my parents this afternoon and both Dano and I felt overwhelmed with tears as we shared with them. We realized that with all we've experienced, we haven't had a chance to really sit with what we've seen.

Our leader asked us last night what were one or two moments that really stood out to us on the trip. The first for me was meeting Beatrice, a widow who started a widows outreach ministry that no has 20,000 widows registered with them. Beatrice lost her husband to a boda-boda (moped) accident. He was a pastor. She was taken in by her brother, but he took advantage of her financially, which often happens. In Uganda you are considered a "problem" if you are a widow. FOr some, they cannot even drink water out of the same well as others because it is believed they will bring their problems to the water. Beatrice told me that one night as she lay crying, God told her to stop mourning and that he couldn't do what he wanted to do through her until she stopped mourning. Beatrice then had a dream where there was a widow in shackles, laying on the ground. ALl of a sudden, the woman stood up and broke free. Beatrice knew then she was to help widows break free. She turned her mourning into dancing. THen through a series of miraculous events, she met this guy, Dave McPherson, who helped her start this widows ministry. At her first conference for the widows, they had 4000 women show up. THey didn't even have money for food. Beatrice said she had two sacks of rice and beans, but didn't know how they'd feed everyone with that. THey prayed and then she said she saw a miracle take place. Every time they took food out, it was as if food was put back in. And they were able to feed everyone. We also went to a hospice center she runs. This was a very beautiful, yet tremendously place to be. Dano took the girls out for this part because the women were so sick - many had cancer all over their bodies. The only drug that could be given to them was morphine to take away the pain. Nothing else would work.I sat there holding hands with a woman who is the same age as my mother and yet looks at least 20 years older. Her son was killed trying to escape Uganda - shot down. Now she has no one to look after her.

The second moment that really stuck out to me was my daughter. Yesterday was very difficult. We visited an orphan-led household. You'll notice when I finally get to upload my pictures that I don't have too many of individual children. Personally, I really struggled with whether or not to take photographs. I felt like I was invading their space - a stranger coming in to their world for only a brief moment and yet asking if I could do such a personal thing as capture them in a photo. This was a real struggle for me at this camp because watching their faces, and their sadness, they knew we were only there for a brief time. And that broke my heart. I have never seen such destitution as I saw in this little village, located so remotely from town. Six huts stood around a common area. The food supply is extremely limited. William, the eldest, is now 18, and he is in charge of his family of six. Both parents died. They cannot go to school. He cannot feed them. We only had juice and biscuits to give. There are six other orphan-led households nearby. If we could get a carepoint in here and have all six families sponsored, then we could get these kids to private school, provide them with food, provide them with padlocks to prevent rape, provide them with a uniform to replace their tattered clothing. So I am praying for a sponsor for William and the other six households.

We Made it to Africa

2008-10-13T11:00:00.001-07:00

Internet access is very slow and limited here, so I am afraid I don't have any picture to post and this will be rather limited. It will be also hard to explain all that we've seen and experienced in the past 48 hours without pictures. We made it into our hotel in Kampala at 2:30 am. (Lori - thank you for arranging for Lawrence to drive us!). Lawrence then picked us up at 11 am to drive us to Bugiri. A three hour drive became a four hour drive. We met our group in Bugiri, rested for 20 minutes and then drove another four hours to Soroti. Our girls are doing so well though. They definitely deserve some treat for being the world's best travelers.

The rest of the group had already experienced so much. I began to think we wouldn't really see as much as we had hoped, but I was wrong. We started our day visiting a children's hospice. It was actually so encouraging - the place is run by a woman named Else who works for YWAM. She started this hospice because she believed children have the right to die with dignity. The amazing thing is how many children who came to die were nursed back to health. We just held the infants in our arms for as long as we could before having to leave. Lian and Anna played outside with the older children. Yesterday, Lian was so eager to play with kids that when we pulled over to get directions, she jumped out of the car and said, "Mommy, can I go play with those kids and say hi?" To her - they are not orphans, or sickly, children - they are children, friends. It has been refreshing to see this trip through her eyes.

We then drove to Otuboi which is a school for older orphans that was run by the government ten years ago, but they asked CHildren of the Nile to take over this. Children of the Nile primarily works with widows, so they have asked CHildren's Hope Chest to take over this school. We had such a great timew ith these older orphans, but the needs are so great. Over 90 children attend teh school, 60 of whom are orphans. When you are an orphan you lose government sponsorship, so they have no money to buy their books. They hope to find work "digging" in people's gardens in order pay for their school books. THeir school is a cement building with two classrooms. The other two classrooms are dormitories - 30 beds in each room. 10 of the boys didn't even have a bed; they sleep on the floor. THere are only five mosquito nets. THey only eat meat once a month. So our group committed, on the spot, to purchase beds for those boys and mosquito nets for all and then we went to the market to buy fish for everyone for one meal. The passion to learn and to move beyond what they have is overwhelming. And convicting.

After lunch, we drove to an IDP camp (Internally Displaced People) and this was very difficult. THere are only 5000 people int he camp right now. THere used to be 25000 when the LRA was more active here. WHen I say camp - these are 8' huts spread all over. We purchased biscuits to hand out to the kids and it was as if kids came out of nowhere. We must have had 500 kids surrounding us. Lian was so thrilled to play. I met a 17 year old mom, Ann, who had a one year old and her child was stricken with malaria. Precious child, precious boy. But the future is limited.

THere is much more to process. I feel very newsy in this post. Tomorrow we head to a widow's hospice and another children's home.

Our new plan or twist in the trip is that Dano and I are headed to Rwanda on the 22nd. We will arrive at 6 pm and leave the next afternoon. Dano was invited to visit some water distribution workt hat Food for the Hungry is doing. We will have the chance to see our friend, Seng Thor, who works for FHI.

Thanks for your prayers.

We're off!!!

2008-10-09T23:22:00.000-07:00

We're off to Uganda and Kenya...and possibly 24 hours in Rwanda (still TBD)...that's another story for another time. Still hard to believe this is happening. We'll try to post when we have internet access. Another place to check on what we are doing is on the blog - www.danieljclark.com.

Lian is so excited. She brought in her atlas to school today to show her classmates where she is going. A mom came up to me and said she was in the classroom when Lian did her presentation and was very impressed. She said Lian even took questions. One of the questions was "What is different in Africa?" Her response was "Children's Hope Chest is there." :)

Anna keeps saying, "Africa? Africa?" While her memory will not recollect this trip at age 2, our prayer is that her heart will remember it.

We'll be in touch!!!

We Leave for Africa in 23 Days!!!

2008-09-17T21:53:00.000-07:00

I don’t even know if we’ve told all of our closest friends about this trip yet, but, yes, as the subject line says, we are going to Africa in 23 days. It’s a long story, but the short of it is that Children’s Hope Chest (www.hopechest.org - I serve on their board) is taking a vision trip to Uganda and we are going to join them there. When I got a contract job this summer, we were going to save the money for a third adoption but decided instead to do this trip. So we have no agenda in going except to be with kids in Uganda and then our friends in Kenya. We’ll trust the money will be there when we adopt again.

I am actually speaking to about 70-80 pastors in our denomination about Hope Chest and the orphan care crisis on Oct 8, so we will be catching up to the group since they are all leaving on the 7^th. We depart Seattle on the 10^th, arrive into Kampala, Uganda at midnight on the 11^th. We will then try to get a decent sleep, let the girls run around in the morning, and then depart mid-morning for Burigi, which is located at the mouth of the Nile. There is an orphanage there we are considering partnering with that has about 100 children. It is run by a Ugandan pastor. The rest of our group will have been there overnight, so we will join them there before departing for Soroti.

Soroti is about five hours north of Kampala. We will be staying in Soroti for two days with a group there that has a very strong and powerful ministry to widows – hospice, conference center, business enterprises. The government also asked them to take over a boarding school that has 90 children, over half of which are orphans. In addition, through their work with the widows they know of another 260 orphan-led households in the surrounding area, and estimates are that there are about 900 nearby. This particular organization does not know how to do orphan ministry and they’ve asked Children’s Hope Chest to come and consider working with them there. We will then return to Kampala on the evening of the 14^th and the rest of the group will leave on the 15^th. We will probably chill out as a family in Kampala for the day before going to Kenya on the 16^th, where we will stay until the 25^th.

For my Gordon friends, we will be hosted in Kenya by my dear, dear friend and college roommate Anne Ndunda. She and her husband and two kids have our entire week planned. We told them we just want to experience life with them and we want to see both the beauty and the pain of their country. Anne is so excited and has taken care of everything there, including a safari! So…..

We all had the joyous experience of getting our many vaccinations today. That was a very tough two hours for the girls. However, now we’ve got our Yellow Fever, Meningitis, Typhoid, etc. and we are good to go J It just makes the trip that much more real.

Prayer Requests –

*Health for our family as we travel

*Anna’s passport’s been expedited, but we are still nervous about it getting here on time

*Open hands and hearts for what God wants to show us in Africa

*The girls’ emotions as we spend time with other orphans

*Transportation from Kampala to Burigi/Soroti

*Discernment for Children’s Hope Chest to know where the best place is to partner when there are so many needs.

I doubt we will have internet access until we get to Nairobi, but we will try to blog about the trip when we can.

We are very excited. This is a dream come true. And the chance to see Anne again is such a gift.

Lian's First Day of Kindergarten

2008-09-09T20:10:00.000-07:00

We can hardly believe that our beautiful little girl is now a kindergartner. It seems like just yesterday that we brought her home. I doubt that I am the only adoptive parent who feels slightly "jipped" in terms of the time we have at home with our children. Starting kindergarten has made me that much more aware that I didn't have her for her entire five years - only four, but they have been four wonderful, wonderful years and there are many more to come. A few friends had to remind me that she wasn't graduating high school, college or getting married - she was just starting kindergarten :) Yet, still...how did she grow up so fast?

It is a full-day program, but we started her half-day in order to ease her into the transition. By the third day, she really wanted to stay for the whole day. So we've done full day this Monday and Tuesday and while she is exhausted, she is so happy. She loves the playground, recess time, choice time (centers) and writing in her journal. She already has homework (very simple, but still it's homework) and has been great at getting that done each day.

Lian is also very blessed to have two of her good friends from church at her school - Emma and Bethany (see below).

Every night around the dinner table, we share our highs and lows of the day. Yesterday, Lian's high was that she got to hug her sister before she left for school. How precious is that? She also told me to remember that when I get lonely I just need to remember that I have an Anna. Don't worry, I told her, Anna will not let me forget. It has actually been wonderful with Anna. Even though she misses her "Jie Jie", she and I have had wonderful one on one time together.

Lian's $16.02 goes a long way

2008-07-11T20:35:00.000-07:00

Ever since the earthquake destroyed much of Sichuan, China, last month, Lian has asked on a weekly basis about what will happen to the kids whose houses were destroyed. She has used the analogy of God parting the Red Sea to talk about how God must have parted the earthquake so it didn't hit the kids in Gaoyou. It is hard to explain the unexplainable discrimination of a natural catastrophe to an adult, never mind a five year old.

I finally got the hint last week after she mentioned it again and this time I asked Lian if she would like to do something to help the children in Sichuan. She said "Yes!" I told her we could not travel there to help them, but maybe she could give some of her money that she has been saving in the bank. Again, an emphatic "Yes!" I asked her how much. Without even pausing she said, "$16.02."

Lian's "Auntie" Jen works for World Vision so we called to ask her if Lian could give her money to World Vision to help the children in Sichuan. In true Jen fashion, Jen orchestrated what I believe to be a truly transformational afternoon for our girls. I took Lian to the bank on Friday where she very confidently walked up to the bank teller and asked her for her $16.02. The banker smiled and said, "You must be going shopping." And Lian replied, "No. I am helping the kids in Sichuan, China."

We then went to World Vision's office to hand her money to someone who would send it to China. I wanted Lian to see where the money was going. Well, Jen, had an entire greeting party for us at the front door - Dean Owen , the director of Public Relations for World Vision, Karen from donations, Rachinda and Kristie from Acting on Aids Campaign. Just amazing. Lian felt like royalty (or at least mom did). Dean took us on a tour of World Vision's museum which highlights how World Vision is helping children around the world. Lian was able to see the packages that her money will help provide to the earthquake victims. Lian wrote a letter that we had translated in Chinese by her tutor and she was so excited to know that Karen would send the letter to a family in China.

Karen told Lian that her $16.02 would provide care packages (tent, lantern, dishes, candles, toiletries, blanket, and food) for four families. In the car later, Lian asked, “Momma, how many kids would $100.16 help?” I told her, “25.” “How many would $1000.60 help?” I told her, “250.” “Wow,” was her reply. Then later when Dano got home, the only thing she wanted to tell him about the time at World Vision was, “My $16 helped 4 kids!”

After we toured the museum, Dean thanked Lian for her gift and gave her a beautiful book on China. He told her he really wanted her to remember this special visit to World Vision. I know she will.

On the way home, I told Lian that God loves a cheerful giver. She just smiled. Dano and I always tell Lian that she has an incredible gift of "helps". She loves to help people. I want to have more of my daughter's heart.

Anna's Readoption is Final

2008-04-23T20:48:00.000-07:00

The last step in our adoption of Anna Mei is called her "readoption." This basically allows us to get her a U.S. birth certificate, which will ensure that she never has any trouble proving her identity should her Chinese birth certificate or adoption decree ever get lost. We started Anna's adoption process back in January 2005. Three years, four months later, we are all done with anything related to adoption paperwork - Praise God!!!!

In an effort to save $500, I became our family's "attorney." For Lian's readoption, we hired an attorney. Now I know why people pay attorneys. I have spent 3 1/2 hours at the King County courthouse since starting this readoption process. I had to learn an entire new language - motions, ex parte, cause number and more. I learned that there is a mad rush upon the clerk's office at 4:27 pm (three minutes before closing). And I learned I do not wish to be an attorney - I could never deal with the bureaucracy.

I thought I had everything compiled in the right order for our 9 am hearing this morning. When we showed up, the 3rd floor clerk informed me that none of the paperwork I submitted to the 6th floor clerk's office had been received (when I filed this three weeks ago, I gave them a huge stack of documents but the clerk had never filed a readoption paperwork before - just my luck). Also, it was apparently a very big deal that I did not have cover sheets on each section of my paperwork. For those of you who know me, you know I don't do well with "systems", so I was ready to explode when they told me that. However, we were very blessed that the adoption facilitator was willing to make me cover sheets so that we could still get our hearing in today.

Finally, the clerk ushered us into Commissioner Joan Allison's chambers where we swore once again (I think this is the fifth time since adoptiong Anna) to love and cherish this precious little girl. The good thing is that despite my ineptness at maneuvering the County Court System, Family Court loves adoptions. After sitting in their courtroom for an hour waiting to file my motion, I now understand why. I was on the brink of tears the entire time listening to marriages disolved, custody battles fought and estates challenged. It was extremely depressing. So for a commissioner to be able to help form a family and honor the love two parents have for an abandoned child is extremely rewarding for them. Thus, they are willing to overlook the bureaucratic mess I created.

There were many emotions today. I cried after we left the courthouse. Some of my tears were tears of joy at ending a process that has lasted over three years; others were tears of frustration at my own feelings of incompetence with the system; and others were tears of anger at a system that creates rather than removes barriers to adoption. St. Augustine said "“Hope has two beautiful daughters: their names are anger and courage. Anger that things are the way they are. Courage to make them the way they ought to be.” Today was a day of both great joy and anger. I am believing our tomorrows will be made of courageous steps to be a voice for more children.

Gaoyou Girls 5th Birthday Celebration

2008-03-20T22:18:00.000-07:00

Ellena, Lara, Lian, Isabella, and Sarah. To see these girls now, four years after their adoption, is to grasp a vision of hope, courage and love. It is sometimes difficult for me to balance just wanting to be a mother to my daughters, and not think of them as orphans, with the realization that the orphan crisis is only growing and that my two daughters are two of the 143 million orphans in the world. Each orphan has a name. Each orphan has beauty inside that these girls capture. Each orphan deserves to be loved and not forgotten.

The members of our adoptive group gather each year to celebrate our girls birthdays. We do not gather to focus on what would have happened. Instead we gather to focus on what is and what will be because these girls are our precious children. But I know that I can work on a professional and personal level to make sure that more children receive the blessing of family. Adoption represents less than a tenth of a percent of orphan care. While I wish everyone could experience the miracle of adoption, I also know that reality says we can't wait for that to happen. We have to ensure that the children who are without families receive its blessing in other ways. That's why I am on the board of Children's Hope Chest (www.hopechest.org). Our friend, Tom Davis, who is its President also writes a blog on these issues - http://www.tomdavis.typepad.com/.

We celebrate these beautiful little girls and the young women they are becoming. And we pray and act for the ones who are left alone.

2008-03-20T21:43:00.000-07:00

Anna loves for us to sing, especially Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes. She pats her head whenever she wants to sing it. This was the first time she did it and I just had to capture it on video. Now she requests this song at least every few minutes throughout the day.

Anna grows more active with each day. She loves to climb things. Today she stacked up some pudding boxes from the closet just so she could reach a higher shelf. She soon learned that pudding boxes don't work very well :)

Big Week - Lian turned five and Anna walked!

2008-03-09T14:37:00.000-07:00

Lian turned five on Thursday. We celebrated with a "Building Bash" birthday party. We had twenty children over and divided them into different work teams where they rotated around their job sites building Marshmallow Towers, a Friendship Wall, a Cranium Fort, and digging in the dirt with dumptrucks and demolishing towers that they built. It was a blast and Lian was so happy all day.

Dano and I both noted how much Lian has grown and matured over this year. She is turning into such a beautiful little girl. Last year it would have been very difficult for her to handle this kind of a party. The anniversary of her adoption last year was very difficult and with all that we've worked through and with much prayer this week, we saw such a growth in her own spirit. She had such joy yesterday and just loved being with all of her friends.

In true "Jennifer" fashion, Lian asked over breakfast what ideas I had for her sixth birthday party. "Lian," I told her, "We haven't even had your fifth birthday party, yet. Can we just enjoy this one first?" She seemed okay with that, until this morning when she told me that she would plan Anna's fifth birthday party for her. Always thinking ahead :)

It was also a big week for Anna. Last Thursday, in the midst of our Chinese luncheon for our home school, Anna took her first steps. If I can ever get my video to upload to You Tube, I will post the video of her first steps. Of course, now that Anna knows she can take a few steps by herself, she wants to be everywhere we don't seem to want her to be. The toilet has become her new favorite place and for some reason she is often found fishing in the toilet. I think we're going to have to get a lock for the toilet. And then she just gives you that sweet little smile that seems to say, "How can you be mad at a face like this?"

It has also been such a joy to see the love developing between these two little girls. Lian loves to teach her sister things and Anna is often found mimicing Lian. This was the first week that Anna said "I love you" to Lian and you should have seen the smile on Lian's face. We continue to pray that they would grow in love and friendship with each other.

The Tragic Death of Another Young Person

2008-01-13T14:21:00.000-08:00

When we moved into our neighborhood six years ago, we knew that we wanted to get involved with the neighborhood youth. We live behind a gas station, so there is always constant activity that requires both prayer and action. Yet, we learned that you cannot expect to earn a young person's trust just because you have good intentions. It took three years of saying hello, asking their names, and just smiling at many who hung out on the corner, before we could ask their opinion as to whether or not they'd be interested in coming to a weekly BBQ at our house during the summer. For the past three years, this has proved to be the highlight of our year - hanging out with 15-40 kids (we've had four year olds come and 21 year olds come) every Thursday night. There's been no agenda...we simply spend time with the kids, offer them food, set up game and art tables, show a movie and shoot a few hoops (they're always surprised that this 35 year old white girl can actually jump). Its been a blessing to us and we've had many of our own stereotypes broken.

I'm feeling reflective and a little somber today though. In three years we have known two young people who have been shot and killed and one street worker who died of AIDS. We attended Jamal's funeral two years ago. He was 19 years old and it was only two months before the birth of his son. Billy Jean died this past summer of AIDS. On Friday morning, I read in the paper that DeChe Morrison, 14 years old, was shot and killed. Our hearts broke. DeChe had come to almost every BBQ. We hired him to mow our lawn a few times when he was trying to earn a few bucks. This past summer he seemed harder and more distant. We had difficulty talking to him, but he still came and brought friends. Now he's gone. The sad thing is that apparently there were friends with him at the time of the shooting, but they left him and didn't call anyone. No one found his body for 14 hours. Then when I called one of the teens we know and asked him if it was truly the DeChe we knew, he agreed without emotion, just said, "People get killed." Dano made the comment to me that when you spend most of your day playing Grand Theft Auto and other violent video games it is no wonder that life loses its value.

We know that there are so many factors - its not just a video game - there is the divorce factor, the lack of father figures factor, the gang factor, the poverty factor, the racism factor - but I'm also convicted of our own tendency to not want to seem like we are about the "truth" factor. When kids hear about a God who does love them, when they see they are not alone because adults show them they are valuable, when someone says hi when they pass them on the street and doesn't turn away because they don't look like them or because they might be a "thug", when they learn there is good and evil and that they have a responsibility to choose the good, rather than being told everything is up for interpretation, when they learn that actions have consequences, then I do believe we will lose less children.

Our little corner of Seattle is just one microcosm of our country. I am devastated that this little corner has known two victims of gang violence in three years - this little corner that is surrounded by many middle and upper class families.

Anna was sick today. I held her so tight today as she was crying and I just prayed for her. I prayed that she and her sister would know that they are loved unconditionally, that they would know truth and be able to stand for truth, that they would love other people, that they would be protected from evil. I do believe in the power of prayer and tonight I will say a prayer for the many children in our city, country and world who long to be prayed for and loved.

Some reflections on Lian

2008-01-03T22:42:00.000-08:00

This blog was originally started to chronicle our journey towards Anna. I realized this weekend that I haven't said much about Lian. This week has been one in which I've marveled at the inner beauty of our nearly five year old. So I thought I would write some thoughts down.

Patient. Generous. Empathetic. Intuitive. Intelligent. Full of Wonder. These are just some of the words I could use to describe Lian. This year has been a tough one, to be honest. We've had to address a lot of issues related to her abandonment that manifested themselves in some tough behaviors. Thanks to the love of friends who challenged us to seek some help, to a wonderful attachment therapist, and many, many prayers, we are seeing true healing take place in our daughter.

Lian is our best helper. She is always wanting to help momma with cooking, cleaning, feeding Anna, planning our new home school and even stamping and labeling the many mailings I have done. And when she gets to help Daddy build our front porch stairs, dollhouse, or at his office, you should see the smile on her face.

Lian is reading voraciously now. It is amazing to see the world this is opening up to her. We think she has read every story in her children's Bible, she loves to read to her dolls and finds such joy in learning new things. Lian was like this as a baby, as well, which is ironic that Anna would rather be where the action is than curled up in a corner reading a book. We love them both.

The best part of our days is when Lian just comes up to us randomly (which seems to be every day lately)and says, "I just came over to give you a hug and a kiss." She always knows just when we need it. I keep thinking each year in her life is my favorite, but each year keeps getting better.

Christmas in Vermont

2007-12-22T21:54:00.000-08:00

While we had a drifting of snow in Seattle a few weeks ago, nothin compares to a good ol' Northeastern storm. We took the redeye from Seattle on Thursday night into Vermont. Remind us not to do that again. The girls actually did great considering they only had about four hours of sleep that night. Lian was so excited to see snow from the plane window that she shouted to everyone, "We're in Vermont!" And she hasn't stopped talking about snow since we arrived.

My parents home is also a bed and breakfast. You couldn't ask for a more idealized version of a New England Christmas. For pictures you can check out www.villagevictorian.com. Tonight, as we walked the two blocks home on snow-packed streets from the one-person operation movie theatre in their little town of Morrisville, Dano said, "You really forget that places like this exist anymore." It's true and I wish everyone could have the chance to grow up in a town where everyone really does know your name, where historic homes remind you to be humble because so many people have gone before you, where the stillness and coldness of the air beckons you to sit in front of a warm fire and be still. It is truly a rest when we return home.

Living in the city, Lian wasn't quite sure what to do when I told her that she could actually play outside without me watching her. It is like Winter Wonderland here. Anna wasn't quite sure what to do with the snow. She tried to eat it. She sat in it. She slid in it. It wasn't until she accidentally got a snowball in her face that she realized snow was really cold and she wasn't sure if it was her thing. Lian braved the snow with gusto. She climbed the 6 foot mountain in my parent's driveway, sledded down its peak, and even braved jumping off of the top of the swingset (wish we had a picture) into a huge pile of snow. She especially liked burying mommy in the snow.

Both girls were also able to pay a special visit to their great-grandmother, Nanny. Nanny is my dad's mom and she is 92 and still as beautiful and elegant as ever. She was so thrilled to see the girls and to especially meet Anna for the first time.

It is hard to see my grandmother in a nursing home and requiring care. She is the matriarch of the family and she carries herself with such strength and grace. Every holiday was spent at her home. There were always at least 25-30 people gathered round the table for dinner. Nanny would give out orders in the kitchen and we would catch up with siblings, aunts and uncles, and cousins as we chopped and diced to her specific instructions. I guess it was chaotic, but I find that I miss those gatherings at this time of the year. I guess that is what holidays do though - they remind us of many memories while allowing us to create new ones for the future.

Happy One Month Anniversary, Anna!

2007-10-19T17:37:00.001-07:00

It has been one month since Anna's adoption. She continues to be a joyful presence in our lives. Anna in Hebrew means grace. An in Chinese means peace and Mei means beautiful. We would both agree that she brings much peace and grace to our family. While Lian is our more introverted, thoughtful, internal processor daughter. Anna seems to be the opposite. She is definitely extroverted, spontaneous, and lets you know what she thinks. Sounds a bit like a mix of their parents :)

Here's a video of Anna laughing, which will give you a brief taste of how joyful she is.

A Recap in Video

2007-10-05T20:33:00.000-07:00

Our friends, Phil and Becky Smith, gave us such a surprising and touching gift this evening. They had been following our blog while we were in China and were so moved by Anna and Lian that they wanted to put our pictures to video and song. You just have to watch it to know why we were so overwhelmed by their gift.

We're Home

2007-09-30T23:38:00.000-07:00

We realize we haven't written for almost a week and we apologize. Internet access was expensive in Guangzhou and we were exhausted, but now we are home and looking forward to updating you on our last few days in China.

This is a picture of our adoption group in Guangzhou, just two days before we left. It was a truly wonderful group to travel with.

After being personally sworn in at the U.S. Consulate on Friday by our friend, Mark Carlson, who works there, we drove to the airport for the first of our return flights home. Of course our flight was delayed by two hours, so we ended arriving into Beijing at 1 am. The group didn't arrive to the hotel until 2 am and I had the unfortunate luck to leave my diaper bag on the plane. I spent the hours of 1-2:30 am hanging out with a Chinese guard. She and I actually had a nice conversation, but I was pretty spent. Arrived to the hotel by 3:15 and then had to wake up at 6:30 am to leave for our flight to the U.S.

But....we made it home and our girls (I love saying "girls" - just seems so natural to say we have two daughters) were amazing on the flight. Lian slept 7 hours on our 11 hour flight from Beijing to San Francisco and Anna slept during her normal nap times and was happy as could be during the rest of the flight. Dano and I didn't sleep, but at least the girls were somewhat rested.

We were greeted in Seattle by several friends and family, who were such a joyous sight to see. We have been overwhelmed in the past 24 hours by the love of our friends. Susan Selby and Melinda Teeny thoroughly cleaned our home, stocked our fridge, and left us an amazing dinner for our first night home. Melinda also arranged meals by women in our church to feed us for the next two weeks. Julie Gray left us a beautiful basket with letters for Lian and Anna from her children. And then the entire leadership team at our church, who were at a retreat together, left a voicemail for our family welcoming us back. When I received the voicemail, I just started crying in thanksgiving for how supported we feel. Today we attended church and were so warmly welcomed. Our girls are surrounded by so many people who have prayed for them since before they were born, who have shown their love in practical ways, and who honor them with their Godly examples.

Now its readjustment time....its midnight and Lian, Dano and I still can't fall asleep. At least Anna is sleeping peacefully. ...whoops - I spoke too soon. She's crying. Better go. I promise I'll have more pictures up soon.

Becoming Sisters

2007-09-23T01:41:00.000-07:00

We spend a lot of time in our hotel room waiting for the government to finish processing Anna Mei's passport, but it has been a good time for bonding. We've also realized how important it is for Lian to have one on one time with each of us, especially with Mommy. However, Daddy is the better game player...and to his credit, he is okay with me publishing the fact that his four year old beat him in chess yesterday. He didn't even see it coming until Lian said, "Checkmate!" Yes, a four year old beat a 36 year old....just a little humbling, but doesn't the winner look so pleased with herself?

Lian is very perceptive and insightful. Today Anna Mei was having a really hard time with her second nap. She just kept crying. Lian looked up at me and said, "She is confused, Mommy."

Me - "About what?"
Lian - "Her parents."
Me - "What should I do?"
Lian - "You should pick her up."

I started singing and then Lian said, again, very gently, "You should sing, "Don't be afraid" to her. So I did and Anna Mei fell asleep. Dano and I both went in and hugged Lian and thanked her for understanding her sister so well and for helping us.

I thought I would type out the words to this simple song so that you can understand the power behind them:

Don't be afraid
My Love is stronger
My love is stronger than your fears
Don't be afraid
My love is stronger
And I have promised
Promised to be always near

We had our first family swim in the lovely green pool of the hotel. Anna Mei just loved it. She didn't cry once. And Lian loved jumping off the wall so that she could "teach" Anna Mei. Anna even put her face in the water and tried to copy how Dano blew bubbles. It was too cute.

Lian's Orphanage in Gaoyou

2007-09-21T02:18:00.000-07:00

Its been a few days since we were in Gaoyou, but I thought I would reflect for a moment on our time at Lian's orphanage.

This is a picture of one of the Ai Yi's who was there when Lian was a baby. Her name is Wang Ping and Lian took an immediate liking to her. How do you thank someone adequately for taking care of your child for the first year of her life? And then you realize there are so many more children who will never be adopted. Less than a tenth of a percent of all the orphans worldwide are adopted.

I asked to hold one of the babies. Lian asked if she was her little sister. It was very difficult for me to say, "No, she is still waiting for her mommy and daddy." Today, in Nanchang, Lian was collecting leaves off of a bush. I asked her what they were for and she said, "These are for all the little girls and boys who don't have mommies and daddies." Somehow she knows in her heart that we cannot forget about them.

I've spent time in orphanages in Russia before, but to visit where my daughter was placed by her birth mother, played, slept , and waited for us was pretty emotional for me. While we continue to struggle with infertility, Dano and I left our visit even more thankful for the way in which our family has been formed. Adoption is truly a miracle of the heart.

Several of the women in our group treated ourselves to a $6/hour massage today. This was the first time we had all left our babies with the dads. One of the new moms said she couldn't believe how hard it was to leave this baby she had only had for three days. Her eyes welled up with tears as she said, "I just didn't realize how quickly I would attach to her." It truly is a miracle and a gift.

2007-09-19T06:57:00.000-07:00

This is my fifth attempt at blogging. I've lost the other four due to internet failure. Or so it seems I have. We can't view any blogs over here in China, so if you now have five of the same posts from me, I apologize.

So while I wrote a lot of nice things last time, I'm afraid I am too tired and will just need to summarize.Today was our official adoption day. Anna Mei is now a Jukanovich and we couldn't be more ecstatic. Uncle Jon has been so amazing and is loved so much by his two nieces.Jon has been our official videographer and seems to be better at posting pictures than I, so you can also check out his blog at http://www.jonathanwolff.blogspot.com.auntie/Auntie

Suzy is spoiling us with being at our beck and call. If you want to follow her blog it is http://www.suzannebaker.blogspot.com/.

The moment we officially welcomed Anna into our family. Lian was being a little silly.We were able to Skype my mom and dad so they could meet Anna Mei in person. The coolest thing is that Anna waved to them all on our her own accord. She hadn't done that for anyone else, so it was very special.

Happy Adoption Day

2007-09-19T06:55:00.000-07:00

This is my fourth attempt at blogging. I've lost the other three due to internet failure. So while I wrote a lot of nice things last time, I'm afraid I am too tired and will just need to summarize.

Today was our official adoption day. Anna Mei is now a Jukanovich and we couldn't be more ecstatic.

Uncle Jon has been so amazing and is loved so much by his two nieces.
Jon has been our official videographer and seems to be better at posting pictures than I, so you can also check out his blog at www.jonathanwolff.blogspot.com.

Auntie Suzy is spoiling us with being at our beck and call. If you want to follow her blog it is www.suzannebaker.blogspot.com.

The moment we officially welcomed Anna into our family. Lian was being a little silly.

We were able to Skype my mom and dad so they could meet Anna Mei in person. The coolest thing is that Anna waved to them all on our her own accord. She hadn't done that for anyone else, so it was very special.

Happy Adoption Day

2007-09-19T06:47:00.000-07:00

Today was our official adoption day. We had to meet with several government officials and swear before them that we would never harm or abandon Anna Mei. We also had to declare our intentions to raise her. Anna Mei was so patient the entire day.

Uncle Jon has been amazing with both of our girls. He's also our official videographer, which has been such a gift. His shoulders have also gotten a workout giving Lian numerous shoulder rides. I can't believe we get to share this experience together.
Auntie Suzy has spoiled us. She thinks of everything we need before we even have time to think. And Lian has made her play several rounds of Memory, Old Maid, Crazy Eights, and Go Fish. Suzanne's patience is such a blessing.

Anna Mei is officially a Jukanovich!!!! She has the sweetest personality. And she loves watching her big sister. It is so fun to watch. Lian definitely needed some one on one time with mommy today, which was really good. She's done so well, but it's hitting her that she is not the baby of the family anymore.
We were able to call my mom and dad through Skype and Suzanne's webcam. Anna Mei was able to meet her Nanna and Poppa and the sweetest thing is that Anna waved to my mom without any prompting. She hasn't done that before, so it was very special for my mom.

We're all a little tired, but it feels so natural to have our two beautiful girls.

Happy Adoption Day

2007-09-18T07:06:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday, Anna Mei!!! At 4 pm this afternoon, we welcomed Anna Mei Jukanovich into our lives and hearts. We feel so blessed and truly overcome with joy. It has been such a whirlwind of a day and we are quite exhausted, but we just settled the girls down to sleep. (For more pictures, click on the picture tab on the left side of our blog. It will take you to our picasa photo gallery.)

Lian is absolutely in love with her sister. She's been such an awesome helper this entire afternoon and evening - wanting to cut up bananas for her, brush her hair, bathe with her - its just been so incredible to see the two of them together. And Dano and I cannot believe we have two children!!!

We've been told that the orphanage had the foster moms bring the children back to the orphanage this past month so that they could transition to our care. Its hard to imagine what must be going on in all of the little girls' minds and hearts. Several times, Anna Mei would just start saying, "Momma" and look towards the door. It was heartbreaking to just think of what she is going through. But on the other hand, she just seems so at home. She has a beautiful smile, she is making lots of sounds and coos, she loves to watch everything that is happening around her, she loves listening to the sound of water, and she has really strong legs and can sit up with much more strength than Lian did. The difference between foster care and institutional care is evident.

Jonathan and Suzanne were such a gift today. So amazing to share this experience with my brother and my best friend. Truly amazing. They're definitely going to need a vacation after this, though :)

OK - need to get some sleep.

We Meet our Daughter in 5 hours!!!

2007-09-17T19:53:00.000-07:00

We landed in Nanchang this morning to discover that instead of meeting our baby girl tomorrow, we will meet her today at 4 pm!!! Needless to say we were shocked. I just started crying because it has been my prayer that I would meet my daughter by or before her first birthday. This happened with Lian and since today is our little girl's first birthday (september 18), it will happen with her as well. Can't believe it.

Its more difficult than I thought to blog here because you're not allowed to actually view your blog and the internet connection is slow. So I hope to have some photos up this afternoon from our time in Gaoyou.

We had such a wonderful time in our 36 hours in Gaoyou. I still cannot believe the miracle of Lian's teacher's friends hosting us. They treated us so well. Their van was very spacious. They even treated us to an authentic Gaoyou meal. We anticipated treating them to dinner, but they would have nothing of it. Such hospitality.

Our time at the orphanage was truly special, but way too short. We were met by the Vice-Mayor of Gaoyou, Ni Wencai, along with the orphanage director and two of the office workers. We asked if any of the Ai Yis (Nannies) from Lian's time were still there - one was. Her name was Wang Ping and it was so sweet to see her with Lian. The truly amazing thing is that they told us we could not use a video camera, but our host, Sun, is a professional videographer. He took our camera and just said, "Let me." And they never stopped him. So we have video footage of our entire visit - Lian's bedroom, the playroom, our time with the orphans, in their school room. Such a gift.

There are only 50 children in the orphanage now. There used to be 250. We were able to see some of the infants, but we saw more of the older children. Many had special needs. It is amazing to see the work Half the Sky Foundation has done there. At the end of the day, I asked Lian how she felt being at the orphanage. She said she was happy to see the Ai Yi, but nervous to go into the playroom. The playroom is where she spent a lot of time. My brother was great though and got her playing with stuff and she didn't want to leave.

We were then treated to a formal lunch with everyone and then the Vice-Mayor took us on a personal tour of several historic sites of Gaoyou. There's a lot more to write on this, but due to the fact that we need to get unpacked, shower, etc. before we meet our little girl, I will keep this short.

Will write more soon and will hopefully get more pictures up for everyone.

We Arrived to Shanghai!

2007-09-15T05:07:00.000-07:00

Dano and I decided we have the world's best little traveler. Sure, she's four and she has her moments, but Lian did an outstanding job during this 18 hour travel day. We are so proud of her and she is so excited to be in China. Quotes from Lian today:

"China is so big that I can't even hold it in my arms."
"It smells here."
"Daddy no longer speaks English. He only speaks Chinese now. Me too. I learn hundreds of words at my school. I will teach you, Mommy." - she then proceeded to interweave actual Chinese words with what we are defining as Lianese

We made it to our hotel. No pictures to display yet. We're still waiting for Jonathan and Suzanne to arrive (by the way, they traveled to Beijing because we have already been there twice and did not want to visit again, but it seemed sad that they would make it all the way to China and not have a picture of the Great Wall).

We leave on the train for Nanjing at 9:15 tomorrow morning. Wish us well!

We're Off in Two Days!!!

2007-09-12T09:54:00.000-07:00

Jonathan and Suzanne left for Beijing this morning. We leave Friday morning, so there's a little bit of excitement in the air. Needless to say Lian is more than excited. Below is our finalized itinerary. We will have one adventurous portion of our trip in that we've decided to travel from Shanghai to Gaoyou without a guide. The cost was extremely expensive and Dano is convinced he can get us on the train from Shanghai to Nanjing and then get us a taxi from Nanjing to Gaoyou. Dano hasn't really spoken Chinese in three years, so we are hoping it will all come back to him :) (I think he's pretty excited about the challenge actually).

One unexpected thing is that we have to go to the Civil Affairs Bureau (CAB) in Nanjing to pay our fee to visit Lian's orphanage. This CAB is where we received Lian three and a half years ago, so I can already feel the tears welling up when I think about going back there. We will only be in Gaoyou for 36 hours before needing to return to Nanjing to catch our flight.

I probably won't write more until we get to China.

Itinerary
Sep 12: WEDNESDAY
UA821 SEASFO 720AM 928AM
UA889 SFOPEK 1107AM 225PM

Sep 13: THURSDAY
Beijing – Arrive Beijing at 2:25pm. Will be met by local guide and
stay at New World Courtyard Hotel.

Sep 14: FRIDAY
Beijing - Tour of the Great Wall. (Breakfast and Lunch included)

Sep 14: FRIDAY
UA729 SEASFO 930AM 1141AM
UA857 SFOPVG 150PM 525PM

Sep 15: SATURDAY
Beijing - Tour of TianAnMen Square, Forbidden City,
Summer Palace. (Breakfast and Lunch included)
Flight MU5156 (5:50 – 7:55pm) to Shanghai.
Shanghai – Jukanovich family will arrive at Pudong airport at 5:25. Check in
Zhongya hotel.
Mr. Wolff and Ms. Baker will arrive Hongqiao airport at 7:55pm.
Will be met by local guide at the airport and check in Zhongya hotel.

Sep 16: SUNDAY
Shanghai – Train D412 (9:15 – 11:38am) to Nanjing.
Drive to Gaoyou.

Sep 17: MONDAY
Gaoyou – Visit Goayou orphanage, lunch with the orphanage staffs.
Drive back to Nanjing. .
Nanjing – Stay at Mandarin Garden Hotel.
Sep 18: TUESDAY
Nanjing – Flight MU2755 (8:20 – 9:25am) to Nanchang.
Nanchang – Arrive Nanchang at 9:25am will be met by local guide
at the airport. Stay at the Gloria Hotel.

Sep 19: WEDNESDAY
Nanchang – Receive your daughter at the CAB office. Interview
with CAB have adoption registration done.
Interview with Justice Dept. Apply for baby’s passport.
Sep 20: THURSDAY
Nanchang – Adjustment time and shop for the need.

Sep 21: FRIDAY
Nanchang – Visit the suburban of Nanchang City.

Sep 22: SATURDAY
Nanchang – City tour.

Sep 23: SUNDAY
Nanchang – Rest and free time.

Sep 24: MONDAY
Nanchang – Pick up the Notary documents.

Sep 25: TUESDAY
Nanchang – Pick up your daughter’s passport.
Flight MU2149 (1:40 – 3:10pm) to Guangzhou.
Guangzhou – Be met by local guide at the airport. Check-in
White Swan Hotel.

Sep 26: WEDNESDAY
Guangzhou – Child’s medical check up, picture taken and fill out the forms.

Sep 27: THURSDAY
Guangzhou – Interview with U. S. Consulate at 11:00am.

Sep 28: FRIDAY
Guangzhou – Pick up baby’s visa. Flight CA1302 (7:55 – 10:55pm)
to Beijing. Stay at the New World Courtyard Hotel.

Sep 29: SATURDAY
UA888 PEKSFO 1200N 844AM
UA322 SFOSEA 1040AM 1245PM

Run for One a Success!

2007-09-04T12:57:00.000-07:00

I did it! It has been 22 years since my last half-marathon (I'm dating myself) and ten years since I ran without problems in my knees. After four months of training and fundraising, I was so psyched to cross the finish line of the Virginia Beach Rock 'n Roll Half-Marathon in 2:17:38. This was the first time Children's Hope Chest hosted a Run for One training team (www.runforone.org/jennifer). There were 25 runners and we raised $80k and the gifts aren't all in yet.

I ran on behalf of Yuri, a 16 year old boy I met on a trip to visit Children's Hope Chest's work in Russia in 2003. At mile 7, 9, and 11, I hit some mental walls, but I just kept thinking - this is nothing to what Yuri has gone through in his life. So I would lift him up in prayer. And then the mental walls would disappear. It was an awesome experience to cross that finish line. Every time I am with the team from Hope Chest, I leave more encouraged and motivated to make sure they succeed as an organization. I was able to meet with so many people from around the country who love these orphaned children (who will never be adopted) succeed as adults in their own country and I was continually humbled. Less than a tenth of a percent of the 143 million orphans in the world will be adopted. We have to find ways to provide the blessing of family for the other 99.9%.

Hope Chest's president, Tom Davis, just wrote a book that is receiving a lot of press - Red Letters: Living a Faith that Bleeds. (http://www.cthomasdavis.com/). We can't all run half-marathons or travel half-way across the world to reach out to an orphan, but Tom has written very practically about the day to day things we can do. I encourage you to check out his campaign for the Five things we can all do - http://www.fivefor50.com/.

Flights are Booked!

2007-08-30T14:28:00.001-07:00

It has been a whirlwind few days. I was speaking at a Korean Church Kids' camp this Monday-Wednesday when I got the call that we did not get the consulate date we requested. Fortunately, it is only a two day delay. Our trip is a bit complicated because my brother, Jonathan, and my friend, Suzanne, are going to travel to Beijing two days ahead of us so they can see the Great Wall, Tiannamen Square, Forbidden City, and Summer Palace. Then they will fly to Shanghai to meet us there and then we will all travel to Gaoyou to visit Lian's birth city. After many, many conversations on the phone with everyone, our flights have finally been booked. So our itinerary looks like:

Sep 11 - Jonathan and Suzanne arrive to Seattle
Sep 12 - Jonathan and Suzanne depart for Beijing
Sep 14 - The Jukanovich family departs for Shanghai
Sep 15 - Everyone meets in Shanghai
Sep 16 - Take the train to Nanjing / Meet tour guide to Gaoyou (It looks like the Vice-Mayor of Gaoyou, Mr. Ni Wencai, is going to host us for this portion of our trip)
Sep 18 - Return to Nanjing / Fly to Nanchang (capital of Jiangxi province)
Sep 19 - 29 (still waiting for final dates of when we will travel to Guangzhou, but our consulate date is Sep 27 and then we return to Seattle on Sep 29)

Tomorrow I leave for Virginia to run a half-marathon on behalf of Children's Hope Chest. While I am running for an orphan I met in 2003, I also feel that I am now running on behalf of my little girl. This race is one of endurance for me and this entire adoption process has been one of extreme endurance. We pray that our little girl will somehow know she is so wanted and loved already and that her family is just two weeks away from bringing her home. Please pray for our time in Gaoyou, especially for Lian as she meets her caregivers and sees where she lived the first year of her life. And then please pray for our new daughter, that amidst her mourning of her foster mother that she will feel very safe and loved with her forever family. Thank you.

Jukanovich Journals

2011 Family Newsletter

The Need for Vacation

Trip to Kaziba Orphanage, Congo

Reflections on April 7

Going to Congo - Would you like to help?

Why I went to Swaziland

The Truth about the Mosque at Ground Zero

My grandmother - a family history

What we do in Rwanda

An Artist You Should Know About

Adoptions are in a 40% Decline

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Photos from Nathanael's First Days Home

Video of Nathanael's Adoption

Welcome Nathanael Niyonzima Jukanovich!

We Have a Court Date!!!

The Miracles of Access

Embracing the Wait

Quick Adoption Update

The Waiting Game

Our Basic Human Pleasures: Food, Sex and Giving

Our Basic Human Pleasures: Food, Sex and Giving

On the Ground

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